She glanced at him. ‘So you’re leaving tomorrow?’
‘At ten.’
‘Morning not night?’
‘Morning. Natara and I are driving to Durban to catch our flight. We’re leaving Rally at seven.’
Kaavi looked away. ‘So I won’t see you tomorrow.’
‘Probably not.’
He paused and then started again, ‘Do you want to go down to Come in Carmen? We could get some cake?’
‘I don’t think so.’
‘Supper, then? Maybe just hang out?’
She shook her head. ‘No. I don’t think so.’
Kaavi stood. ‘I better go.’
She felt it rising in her throat, the ache, the pressure. It felt like she might be sick. She never did goodbyes. If she did, she wouldn’t have left him a note the last time she’d walked away.
He wasn’t asking her to come back with him. He wasn’t asking anything at all.
So, this is it, Kaavi thought.
‘We’re not even getting a proper goodbye?’ Neel asked quietly.
Kaavi shook her head. ‘I don’t know what a proper goodbye is.’
Neel nodded. ‘Me neither. What is a proper goodbye, anyway? In this situation, do I shake your hand? Hug you? Do you against the wall?’
‘Neel,’ she said, half laughing, half stunned.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said, grinning. ‘I was thinking it, so I figured I might as well say it.’
She shook her head, still smiling, but there was a weight behind it. There was something sad they both weren’t naming.
Neel hesitated. ‘About the divorce papers …’
‘Not now,’ she cut in. ‘We can talk on the phone. Later.’
He nodded, then his voice dropped. ‘Then I need you to walk out that door.’
Kaavi nodded slowly.
Should she tell him that she wanted to go with him, that she needed him, that she didn’t want the divorce.
But then she looked at him, sweet, steady Neel. What would he say? That he wanted her back because he felt sorry for her?
After Kaavi left, Neel went back to work. He answered a few emails, called Sarika and even rang Ryan to say he was coming back. Ryan, of course, tried to pry about Kaavi, but Neel didn’t give away much. He needed to talk to someone, though, andNatara wouldn’t do. She was too close to the situation and too biased.
So he changed into jeans and a plain T-shirt and headed down to the bar, hoping Gavin was around. Sure enough, there he was, planted on a barstool like always.
The bartender spotted Neel. ‘Beer?’
Neel nodded and slid onto the stool next to Gavin.
