Neel stood.
‘I need some water. You?’
She nodded. He walked to the refrigerator behind her in the kitchen and looked over his shoulder to see if she was watching him. As she was still facing forward, he covered his eyes with his palm. He felt physically ill. He’d never felt that way, even when Kaavi left him. He quickly pulled himself together. But when he reached into the fridge, his hand was shaking. He grabbed two bottles of water and went back to her.
She took the bottle he held out to her but didn’t open it.
He sat back down.
‘I was sent to the correctional service centre, also known as prison … the slammer … the joint. Rikesh and Tarisha managed to get word to Sen because they remembered him from when he’d visited. He was serving his articles at his father’s law firm. My uncle is one of the best criminal defence lawyers in the country. But it was of no use. An urgent application for bail was launched. My uncle, representing me, was further proof that I had the means to run if I got bail. We lost. My grandfather launched his own application against my father for abuse ofpolice power, but it was thrown out because my father had strong connections in the judiciary.
‘Days became weeks. My uncle and Sen researched every avenue to get me out but lost every time. How could they? The judges were corrupt. My father was a wealthy man. It was easy to pay them off.’
Kaavi took a deep breath before continuing: ‘About a month in, I was assaulted. It happened so fast …’
Neel gripped his water bottle so tightly that it crumpled in his hand.
‘As I was saying, it happened so fast. All I remember was lying on the cold floor trying to block the kicks. I at least covered my face. This face later proved to be an asset to me.’
‘Kaavi, I have to interrupt. I’m sorry.’
‘Yes?’
‘I … I just …’
She reached out and brushed her thumb over his cheek.
‘I know, Neel. You want to go back in time and help me but because you can’t, you feel helpless. But youhaveto know. I want you to know,’ she said kindly.
He nodded.
‘I was assaulted. I woke up in the prison hospital with two broken ribs and plenty of bruises. Word got to my father. He still refused to drop the charge. I became an easy target. I was a cop’s daughter. I was with women accused of mass murders, robbery … all because I’d used my father’s car without his permission. Sen stayed in a hotel in the city the whole time I was in jail – to visit me and try to fight my case. But he wasn’t the only visitor. My father sent cops in full uniform to taunt me. They’d insinuate that my mother was dead. Sen lodged a harassment charge against the police service, but it didn’t go anywhere because there was no proof. Their names were not recorded in the visitors’ log.
‘I never heard from my mother. She didn’t fight for me. She didn’t stand up for me. Sen assured me that she was alive but still with my father.’
Again, Kaavi paused, staring straight ahead.
‘I was on constant high alert. My body would literally quake with fear. I couldn’t sleep. I had to watch my back. I made three more visits to the prison hospital: broken finger, a bite on my arm and a concussion.’
She shook her head, eyes blurred with tears.
‘It was the third of March. I felt okay that day. Sen and my grandfather were coming to visit. I didn’t even see it coming. All I remember is the pain. I got stabbed in my thigh. There was so much blood … I could have died. I was rushed to the prison hospital. Two days later, I lay in that bed, broken, beaten and almost lifeless, when the warden arrived. I was being released. The charges were suddenly dropped. Neel, I was an awaiting trial prisoner for close to two months.’
She gasped softly as she found herself on Neel’s lap, her head resting on his shoulder. Neel buried his face into her shoulder, his breath warm against her skin. His arms tightened around her, as if he could shield her from the pain with his presence alone. The silence was thick, filled with the unspoken anguish he felt for her. He held her firmly, his own emotions a turbulent mix of sadness and fierce protectiveness.
‘I’m so sorry,’ he whispered, his voice muffled against her neck. ‘I had no idea.’
She didn’t respond. She just held onto him tightly.
aavi sat at a table with panoramic views of Sandton. The hotel’s coffee shop on the top floor was quieter than she’d expected, but then she remembered it was the middle of a Tuesday afternoon.
She’d told Neel she needed to get out of the house. He wanted to go with her, but she said she needed to speak to Sen alone. She lied. She just needed space. But she got him to drop her off at the hotel where Sen and Shona were staying, which she knew had a great coffee shop.
She ordered an iced hazelnut latte and gave in to the craving for a slice of chocolate cake. She hid her turmoil behind her appearance. She wore well-fitted jeans and a white blouse that accentuated her new curves. Her hair cascaded down her back, and her makeup was expertly done. She even wore high-heeled strappy sandals.
She sipped her latte and closed her eyes briefly. She should have been feeling anxious, but since revealing to Neel what had happened to her, she felt a sense of calm. He always made her feel safe. Her therapist said she didn’t have panic attacks whenthey were together because he grounded her. Also that the scars of the past couldn’t be erased but that they could heal. It was a miracle to her that none of the attacks in prison had left any prominent physical scars. She might not have been able to enter the modelling world if they had. Ten years later, the scar on her thigh was minute. She often asked herself how a father could put his child through what she endured. Her grandfather said it was pure evil. Her therapist said her father was a psychopath.
How could her mother ever have fallen in love with him? Their lives could have been so different. Her father inherited his family’s fortune when her grandfather died a couple of months before she was born. He didn’t need to work as a cop. But the badge gave him power over others. She had long accepted that her father didn’t love her. It was just one of those things.
