Of course,she had followed him out of the room.Of course.
Luke’s heart filled but then just as quickly squeezed tight. He wanted more than anything to hold her, to inhale the sweet fragrance of her hair. But if he did that, he’d never be able to let go.
And he had no choice. What they’d done… If all was as it ought to be, it would have been unforgivable. The issues with the license might have alleviated some of his guilt, but this wasn’t just about Naomi and him, or even Arthur. A child was concerned.
Amelia needed to be protected from all of this.
Summoning his self-control, Luke straightened his shoulders. “Naomi.” He almost choked on her name. He’d anticipated this moment for months. Damn Gil for being alive. Especially after…
Guilt arose to smother his frustration, and he chastised himself for entertaining such thoughts. There was no need for anyone to ever damn Gil to hell again. His oldest friend was already there and would become acquainted with the devil himself all too soon.
But there was always the chance that it might take longer. Tempest had already sent for the best physician in the shire. Gil would never be well again, but it was possible that he might linger for months, years.
“What happened?” The confusion in her eyes mirrored what he’d felt the day he’d entered an enemy hut and found his friend, thrashing on a cot, burning with fever but alive.
“The ague.” It wasn’t uncommon for soldiers to contract it. If caught early and treated properly, most could even survive. As long as they were young, strong, and healthy.
Gil had only one of those going for him. In the months since Luke had seen him, his friend had become a shadow of his former self. He claimed he’d been starved and treated poorly by his captors.
“Don’t let him touch you.” He doubted she would, and she doubted Gil had the strength to do so, but… “He’s contracted the pox.”
Her eyes widened and then a shudder ran through her small frame. “The sores.”
Luke nodded and watched as all the ramifications assaulted her. Gil’s return, this illness… and his inevitable death, a second one, essentially. His fingers itched to stroke the delicate line of her jaw, but he only allowed himself to reach for her hands.
She was more beautiful now than when he’d left her. And the baby. A beautiful little girl, only she looked just like her father.
He’d expected to wait a full year, but Gil’s return changed everything. The life Luke had dreamed of went up in smoke the day his unit invaded the insurgents’ compound.
It shouldn’t have.She was his.Damnit, he was hers.
“I wouldn’t.” Her voice emerged a whisper, her eyes begging him for reassurance.
Luke squeezed both of her hands but then took another step back. He hated that he felt awkward with her. He hated everything about this.Cut me open and bleed me out, but not this.
“We… need to wait.”
“I know… I just.” Her voice broke.
He knew what she needed to hear, but he couldn’t bring himself to speculate. No one could possibly know. And to wish the time away seemed almost evil.
Luke smiled sadly and shook his head. “Could be months. Could be years.”
She stared at him and then swallowed hard. By all rights, she should be his, but to protect her and her daughter from the potential scandal…
“What will you do?” Her question nearly ripped his heart in two. He turned to stare at a vase of flowers placed on a pedestal near the door, unable to meet whatever he would find in her eyes.
“I’ll wait to sell out.”
She stifled what he could only imagine would have been a sob. How many times had he held her while she’d cried over Gil? Luke berated himself a thousand times for not insisting he have more evidence of his men’s deaths. He ought to have investigated, demanded remains.
If he could have saved Gil all those months ago… But then there was the matter of Gil’s numerous deceptions. How much of it would have ever come to light if he’d never been captured, never declared dead? They were mired in a tangled mess of lies and betrayal, and all he could do was wait.
“You’ll return to the conflict?”
He couldn’t look at her. “Yes.” And then he cleared his throat. “It’s for the best.”
Naomi didn’t respond right away, obviously struggling with all this, but when she did, her voice was steady and clear and true.
