Or because she was terrified?
An army of nerves exploded in her chest.
Not only had she run away, but she was going to marry a man whom her father disapproved of vehemently.
Her sister would not be there to see it, nor would her mother.
Goldie paced across the room and stared out the window down at the gardener’s hut, which was set just on the edge of what would be lush gardens come April.
She would be the mistress of this house. Lady Standish.
A countess!
What would her life look like by then?
Her stomach lurched, sending her rushing over to the chamber pot where she wretched up most of the food she’d consumed earlier. Thank heavens the girls, her future sisters, were not there to witness it.
After wiping her mouth and cleaning her teeth, she lowered herself onto a chair and bent forward. When a knock sounded, assuming it would be Caroline again, she glanced up. “Come in.”
But it was not Caroline. It was Reed. She drank in the sight of him, hoping to find the thousands of reassurances she needed.
He’d changed into a formal jacket, and his thick dark hair was combed away from his face. The cravat he wore tilted a little to one side, but that only added to his looks. In fact, each time she saw him, he appeared more handsome than before.
“Is it time already?” She sat up.
Reed shook his head. “Not quite, but I wanted a few minutes alone with you.” He kept his glistening blue gaze fixed on her as he drew up a chair.
“I like your mother,” Goldie burst out.
Reed smiled softly. “She likes you too.”
“And your sisters,” she added. Why did she feel so awkward all of a sudden? Why, just that morning, he’d had his hand up her gown, doing unspeakable things!
“They adore you.” He held her gaze, looking open, inviting any questions. “You look beautiful, but how are you?” She’d heard about people gazing into one another’s souls but never believed it could happen until that moment.
She had nothing to hide from this man, which was odd, and yet, fitting.
“This is… all happening so fast,” Goldie admitted.
“I’d go about it differently, but—”
“I know. It’s important to squash the rumors.”
“Yes.” He dipped his chin. “But it will also stir up a new scandal.”
“Which is precisely the point,” Goldie supplied. She understood all of this. His mother had thanked her. His sisters had welcomed her with open arms.
By marrying him, she was helping him. But she hoped there would be more to their marriage. She was betting her life on it.
“By stirring up a scandal, it’s possible your father will issue a challenge. If he does, how would you like me to handle him? I’m not unwilling to face him, but he is your father. What would you have me do?” All his focus was on her, making every inch of her skin come to life.
Goldie flicked her gaze to his mouth, and then down to his hands. Remembering the way he’d touched her earlier. Her breasts tightened with an achy sensation.
But he was asking her how she’d have him deal with her father.
“I’d rather neither of you killed the other,” she said.
Even if her father had shown he possessed no regard for her feelings.
