Bethany wriggled her shoulders, hoping to loosen the bands that had tightened around them.
She had not been jilted. And she’d somehow managed to face all these people without dissolving into a puddle of shame.
Don’t think about what they witnessed in the garden. Don’t dwell on what you must have looked like. Don’t consider what they saw.
Don’t imagine what his hand had felt like on her skin.
“Shall we begin, My Lady?” Chase cocked one brow, a corner of his mouth lifting in a half-smile.
But Bethany didn’t answer right away. She was distracted by his cravat, which was slightly askew. Seeing the odd angle of the garment—along with his blackened eye and bruised face—warred with her relief of a moment before. It reminded her that all was not as it should be, despite his jovial mood.
“Bethany?”
“I—yes. Please.” She turned to face the altar and stared up at the large painting behind it:The Lord’s Supper.And just above where she stood, silver lamps hung from the distant ceiling. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. They had been placed symmetrically, spanning the width of the altar.
Seven lamps.
She exhaled a trembling breath. The fact that there were seven lamps was a good sign.
“Dearly beloved. We have come together in the presence of God to witness and bless the joining together of this man and this woman in Holy Matrimony…”
Bethany glanced sideways. This ceremony was proceeding. It wasn’t a dream but somehow it wasn’t the nightmare she’d expected either.
She clasped her bouquet tightly.
No matter how many times she reminded herself that this wasn’t real, a part of her couldn’t help but feel thrilled to be standing beside him.
Chase caught her staring and winked with his good eye, sending tiny bursts of pleasure swirling through her.
Good heavens, but she was going to have to be careful to keep her true feelings from him.If you were in love with me, I’d have reason for concern.
Not that she was actually, in fact,in lovewith him. She’d considered herself in love with him for a long time but perhaps love was too strong of a word to describe the emotions she’d repressed over the years.
Shelikedhim,very much, and had for avery longtime. She’dpinedfor him. She’d been infatuated. He gave her butterflies and had her imagining all sorts of ridiculous scenarios.
If you were in love with me, I’d have reason for concern.
There was no reason for him to be concerned. None at all. Bethany exhaled a deep breath as the Rector’s voice droned on.
She most definitely did not want Chase guessing as to the nature of her feelings.
F-e-e-l-i-n-g-s.Eight letters for multiple feelings—seven for a singular emotion.
“The union of husband and wife in heart, body, and mind…” An entire slew of five and six letter words. “…for the procreation of children and their nurture in knowledge and love…”
Did he intend to bed her tonight? How many times had she imagined being in his arms?
Surely, they couldn’t have a marriage in name only? He’d not given her an answer when she’d asked what came after the wedding. Had he avoided the question intentionally? He’d never even kissed her.
Now was not the time to contemplate the night ahead. They were in a church and this was a wedding ceremony.
Herwedding ceremony! A pivotal moment in her life.W-e-d-d-i-n-g.Seven.
The rector directed them to sit together on two wooden chairs set off to the side of the altar and, taking her hand, Chase led her there. He didn’t release her hand even after they were seated, and the rector preceded with the religious parts of the ceremony.
“Breathe.” His breath brushed her cheek.
She was breathing—for the most part.
