She had no recent memory of the last time her mother had cared about her welfare.
Was she missing the company of her eldest daughter, now that Louella had married? As pathetic as the thought was, Olivia craved such affection, nonetheless. Her mother had not been the person to decide to send her to the dower house. She merely had not objected to her husband’s decision to do so.
If this was a genuine gesture, Olivia could not ignore it. “Thank you, Mother.” She lifted the damp material away from her legs and took another step closer to the fire. “I am a little chilled.”
And terrified.
Terrified of what was happening up at the mine. Terrified for Gabriel’s safety. And Luke Smith’s. And Mary’s brother and every other man who might be buried this very moment in dirt and rubble and mud.
The memory of her dream sent a tremor through her frame.
And then her mother appeared at her side to drop her own shawl around Olivia’s shoulders. “Come, now. Sit down. Foster will feed the fire, and it’ll be warm as toast in no time at all.”
Olivia allowed herself to be led to a nearby sofa to sit down beside her mother.
The comforting embrace was nearly too much to endure.
“What if it’s true, Mama? What if it’s collapsed on them?”
“Hush. I’m not surprised that you are so concerned. Do you love him?”
Olivia jerked her head up. How could her mother know? Had she and Gabriel been seen together that day in the water? Or yesterday on the road? She hadn’t told anyone, not even Eliza. And she certainly hadn’t mentioned anything about it in her letters to Louella.
“I did not think you’d accept him when your father mentioned that he’d given the man permission to ask you. But I suppose you get lonely from time to time. And by the look of you today, I can almost believe that you have a tendre for him.”
Was it possible Gabriel had actually met with her father?
“Lord Kingsley—“ she began. And then the truth hit her like a bucket of freezing cold water.
Her mother was speaking of Luke Smith.
But no one knew yet that she’d consented. She’d barely come to terms with it herself.
“I’m concerned for all of them, Mother.”
“But you intend to accept him?”
“I–I don’t know.” She couldn’t yet admit what she’d done.
“You’ll be a mother without the worry of passing on your affliction. I do hope Mr. Smith comprehends the dire consequences should you come to be with child.” Her mother dropped her gaze to her hands. “There are things both a man and a woman can do to prevent his seed from taking.”
Heat flushed Olivia’s cheeks. “I would not dream of speaking to him about any of this.” She jolted so that she sat with her spine taut and stiff, but her mother did not seem to notice and persisted with the uncomfortable topic of conversation.
“It’s bad enough we’ve had to deal with your curse. It wouldn’t do at all to have to deal with another one.”
This? This was why her mother had wished for her to remain?
Olivia could not leave without asking a question she’d wondered about for years. “Do you truly think that my eye is a curse?” Up until that moment, Olivia hadn’t really believed her mother had put any stock into her father’s convictions. But now…
Her mother dropped the arm that she’d had around her and shrugged. “One can never be certain. What with another collapse up there. And you are all too aware of other tragedies to have befallen on this family. Why take unnecessary chances?”
Why take chances? Because this is my life? Because I am a person!
“Didn’t you mention once that you had an aunt with a similar condition? Don’t you think it’s possible that it is something that is passed through a mother’s blood?”
Her mother smiled slightly. “Louella’s eyes do not wander, nor did William’s. Anyhow, if it did prove to be the cause, my dear, why ever would you wish to take such a risk? You wouldn’t wish this on another child such as yourself, now would you?”
She’d never thought it to be so horrible until her parents had told her it was. Until they’d ordered her to lower her eyes in the company of strangers.
