Hugh nodded, appreciative of the sentiments. If only he were hearing them under different circumstances. What if he had not been told of her condition? What if Periwinkle had lied and theirs was a simple engagement, after all.
He would have been pleased to see her. He would have chastised her for coming without her mother, but he would have taken her into his arms. He would have wanted to hold her and receive comfort from doing so.
He would have also scolded her for traveling so far, with only a few outriders for protection. Highwaymen were a very real threat, especially to single coaches.
She’d been lucky, indeed, to travel so very far without any such mishap.
And for that reason, he decided to pretend not to know. He would wait and see how far she was willing to deceive him.
He walked around his desk and sat down on the front of it, directly facing her, his feet practically touching hers. “I thank you.” And then she rose, suddenly, practically knocking him backward in the process.
He reached out and grasped her elbows in order to stabilize them both. She did not release his arms where she’d grabbed as well. “I have so much to discuss with you. I wanted to speak with you about something when you proposed but I could not. And then you were gone.” She looked up into his eyes and smiled in an attempt at self-mockery. “And…” She tilted her head to the side. “I missed you.”
Forgetting his anger for the moment, he leaned his head down and found her lips. He’d missed her, too. God help him, but he had.
He released her elbows, wrapping his arms around her, and pulled her closer. He would enjoy this for just a moment. Her lips moved tentatively under his, opening eagerly when his tongue sought entry.
She tasted of lemons and pastries. She felt precious and soft.
And then he felt it.
A part of her that was not soft. A part that was not like anything he’d ever felt before.
He broke the kiss as if he’d been burned.
Turning from her he walked over toward the ceiling-high bookshelves and placed his hands along the shelf above his head. Closing his eyes, he leaned his forehead into the books lined up in front of him.
“That’s what I needed to speak with you about, Hugh.”
* * *
She knew the second his body made contact with it, withthem, that he’d realized her condition. She watched as he turned away from her, rigid with anger? Looking defeated? Hating her?
Most likely, all of the above.
Touching her belly, she massaged it softly. She’d come to love soothing the little bulge. She’d been feeling them now for two days—at least she presumed she was—tiny butterflies, fluttering their wings inside of her womb.
Suddenly, the words which had been so difficult to utter before came rushing up inside of her. “I know you’ll think me crazy, insane even! What I’ve done was unconscionable. But I cannot undo things.”
He didn’t move or speak.
“And I won’t blame you for hating me for it.” Her voice cracked a little as she swallowed a sob. She was determined to get through this without breaking down into tears. He deserved that much. “It’s just that you were the only one there. I wasn’t thinking straight, and I was so overwhelmed by the birth of the little marquess.”
Hugh turned around slowly and regarded her through narrowed eyes. “What are you talking about? Good God! Not Cortland!”
She was confused for a moment. “Oh, no! No! What must you think of me? Of course, I would never! He is my very dear friend’s husband!”
“A servant then? Penelope? Was it a nearby tenant? Where is this man and why will he not take care of his responsibility? My best guess at this question is that he is already married. For if there were such a man within thetonwho was unmarried, who put you in this condition and has refused to do what’s right, I would have held the shotgun to his head for you myself, Penelope. I would have assisted you, as your friend. But why did you have to take this depraved course?”
Oh, she had not yet told him the very worst part. “Hugh, will you please sit down? Will you give me a chance to explain?” When he met her eyes, she twisted her mouth ruefully. “It’s all rather embarrassing, really.”
He contemplated her for just a moment before acquiescing to her request. He returned to the chair behind his desk and waited.
Penelope exhaled. She could do this. Shemustdo this.
“I took advantage of you at Summer’s Park… when you were… inebriated.”
Hugh raised his brows. “You?” he said somewhat sarcastically, “took advantage ofme?”
