Unknown:She’s at Mercy General in Denver.
Unknown:Still no word. I think they’re doing an emergency C-section.
Unknown:Just thought you’d want to know…
Me:Just got this. Any news?
My hands are shaking.
This can’t be right.
This world can’t go on without her. My world can’t go on without her in it.
The little bubbles start bouncing up and down and another text comes through.
Unknown:Toxemia. I have no idea what it is, but apparently, it’s bad.
This isn’t happening. I can’t.
Suddenly, none of this matters. Not the band. Not the tour. Not the stage guys. Nothing matters without her.
And I’m fucking trapped in a secured lot behind the stadium.
Visions of her cloud my mind. I’m in a world of hurt and numb at the same time.
I hit the Uber App and call up a car. I grab my wallet, pull on a jacket and my hat. Not backwards. Forwards. I pull the bill down low over my face. It’ll be a miracle if I can get out of here without being spotted. Hopefully, most of the fans have gone home. Security doesn’t care that I’m leaving. They’re there to keep people out.
I’m running down the corridor to one of the exits and burst outside as though I’m coming up for air. Charlie.
Sweet, forgiving…my angel. My little pregnant hippie.
I see her clearly in my mind, at the restaurant when that fucking waiter judged her… Apologizing for her hormones… In my cabin spread out before me… sitting at the bar top in my kitchen, reading my song… taking care of my feet.
I see her eyes glaze over when I bury myself in her warmth. My throat feels clogged. With tears. With need.
I’m not a praying guy but I’m chanting to God. Begging Him to save her.
At the airport, the next flight to Denver doesn’t leave for an hour. I Google Toxemia… No. Not my Charlie. She’ll pull through. She has to!
Me:News?
Unknown:Nothing.
Me:I’ll be there in four hours. Thanks for keeping me posted man.
A few people approach me. They want autographs. Not now. I narrow my eyes. They get the message. By the time the plane is boarding, I’m a wreck. I’ve read everything I can about Toxemia and feel so fucking helpless. Left untreated both baby and the mom… God, if Charlie loses this baby. My eyes sting.
Max:Where the fuck are you?”
Me:I’m boarding a plane for Denver. Cancel Fort Lauderdale.
And then I turn off my phone.
As soon asI walk into the hospital, I know this is where I need to be right now. I need to be there for her. She is my person.
I need to be hers.
Teri, her friend from work, meets me in the waiting room. She takes one look at me and shakes her head. “She’s damn near impossible to walk away from, isn’t she?” The woman looks tired.
