I’m trying to be gentle.
“Fuck me hard, Colt.”
All I need to hear.
The bed’s rocking. So close. She grabs my hand and slides my thumb across her lips. When her tongue strokes it, I’m gone. Deeper. Deeper. This… connection. The words “Two become one” flit through my mind. Her heat. The slapping sounds as I increase our pace. And now. “Fuck. Fuck. God, Charlie.”
I release my seed into a woman for the first time in my life.
This woman.
She’s surreal.
She’s mine.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Charlie
Iwasn’t preparedfor this. For him. My day was crazy, frustrating. Disappointing. I really thought Squirt had turned. I’d convinced myself of it. When Susan told me he hadn’t yet– after waiting around an extra hour to see her– I lost it.
And then seeing how upset I was, the midwife spent the next twenty minutes discussing things I could try. Admittedly, she told me half of them were old wives’ tales, but– she also told me– old wives’ tales worked sometimes.
She also told me to expect these emotional rollercoasters.
Which is pretty much where I am right now. The news about Squirt. The caring in Colt’s voice when I got home. He sounded like he’d been worried about me.
And now this.
This love making. Achingly tender but also desperate. I don’t know if I’ve imagined it. I easily could have… but… Did I?
The love I felt in each caress, in the care in which he entered me. And then, Oh God. Every thrust. Like he needs to touch every part of me if he wants to go on living.
I can’t contain the tears rolling down my face as I lay here with Colt’s rock hard, naked body wrapped around me.
I don’t want him to see me like this. It’s just… so. Much.
The sex. The release. The intimacy.
Amazing. Physically awesome.
But the avalanche of emotions I feel from him… No words.
Mind-blowing.
“What’s this?” He leans around to peer at me. I hate how guilt-ridden he looks. He catches my tears with his thumb.
I’m shaking my head. I want to reassure him, but I sometimes feel like his emotions are a minefield.
“You,” I finally manage. “I didn’t expect someone like you to come into my life right now.” A small glimmer of understanding appears in his stormy gaze. I roll around so I can see him better and stroke the short stubble on his jaw. His magnetism, his sheer sex appeal… “I keep trying to tell myself to keep this light, you know?” He nods and winces a little. “But… this. What just happened. It wasn’t light.”
There.
I’ve said it.
He scrubs his hand across his face and lets out a long breath. “I thought this was what you wanted.” Even though neither of us has moved, a distance seems to have widened between us. It’s not what I wanted but I’ve never been the sort of person to play games.
“It was,” I say. “It is.” But is it? “I don’t know. Forget it.” I need to leave. I’m naked. Exposed.
