Theo, entirely unaware of my inner meltdown, skated past, offering a nod and a small smirk. My heart seized a little. He felt good and he was loving it. But it was all so fragile. Synthetic. Dangerous.
The whistle blew. McAvoy reset the drills, calling out combinations, switches, coverage angles. The boys responded instantly, Mason driving hard, Grayson cutting inside, Shawn hammering along the boards, Tucker and Theo splitting coverage like they’d done it a thousand times before. Landon shadowed each play, alert, waiting for his moment.
Theo’s shoulder held up, and relief collided with fear in my chest. I was in too deep. Too far. I’d gambled my integrity, my career, his health… Every move he aced was a reminder of what I couldn’t undo.
I could only hope the line between victory and catastrophe didn’t blur in front of the committee.
One of the committee members called an end to the drills. They’d seen all they needed to see. But I didn’t linger to watch them compare notes or talk up the coach. Every second in thatarena made my chest twist tighter, a reminder that I’d skirted disaster by the thinnest margin.
I moved quickly down the concourse, breaking into the outside parking lot with a desperate push that wasn’t warranted by the moment. The bright afternoon sun assaulted me like a spotlight I hadn’t asked for. My hand tightened on my keys, and I’d almost made it all the way to my car when a familiar voice cut through the quiet, stopping me cold.
“Come grab a drink with us,” Holly said, tossing her hair back and gesturing over her shoulder.
I followed her glance. Theo and Hunter were heading out too, the rest of the team trailing behind, sticks and bags in tow. A spontaneous post-evaluation debrief disguised as camaraderie. The thought didn’t appeal to me. The worst possible time to drink with the player I’d been lying for, the one I’d kissed, the one I’d staked my whole career on.
“I’m good,” I said, already turning toward my car.
Holly didn’t push, and I felt myself sighing to the sound of her heels on the asphalt as she walked away. I finally let my shoulders drop, thinking I was home free. Only to hear the deep, familiar timbre of McAvoy behind me.
“Good work today, Hopper.”
I turned, keys dangling in the car door. “It wasn’t me out there on the ice.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, but it’s your help that got them there. Especially Theo. The kid’s made a complete turnaround. What magic are you working in that med bay?”
I laughed past the lump in my throat. “You know what they say—there’s nothing a little eye of newt can’t fix.”
“Eye of newt.” He laughed so hard it got the attention of the guys across the lot. “Well, whatever you’re doing, keep it up. Might even be enough for management to ease off the idea of trading him.” My heart stopped, but not in the good way like when Theo had his hands on me earlier. It was a decidedly bad way. “You haven’t mentioned anything to him, have you?”
I shook my head. “Not my place. I do my job. That’s it.”
He studied me for a beat longer, then smiled faintly and clapped me on the shoulder. “And you keep it up, I’ll write that recommendation letter for you to replace Van der Berg once he leaves.”
I was a wreck sliding into my seat once he’d left. On the verge of getting everything I’d wanted. How could someone feel on top of the world and like absolute shit at the same time?
15
Theo
She was right. She had warned me, but I’d wanted that moment of relief, the ghost of normal I’d been chasing for months. Pain-free—even for a few hours—was worth the cost.
Except now her words were coming back to haunt me. Just because I didn’t feel it, didn’t mean I wasn’t doing damage.
I paced the hotel room, the ice pack pressing against my skin, cold numbing the joint but not enough to quiet the gnawing ache. I checked my phone again. Still nothing. It had been fifteen minutes since I’d texted her. She was either ignoring me, or already on the bus waiting for everyone else. It was just like her to be early.
My thumb hovered over our chat, itching to shoot through one more message. Just in case. But a soft knock at the door told me that wouldn’t be necessary. She was here.
“What’s the emergency?” She was dressed and ready to go, kit bag slung over her shoulder, default scowl pinching her otherwise open features.
“Don’t make that face,” I said, stepping aside for her to come in. “I just missed you, is all.”
Reese rolled her eyes, though the corners of her mouth twitched as she pushed past me, thinking I hadn’t noticed. “You’re not even dressed. The bus leaves in five minutes.”
I caught the flicker in her gaze, the half-lidded glance sliding over me like she was trying not to register exactly what I looked like in nothing but sweatpants. It started out as me just needing to ice my shoulder, but now I thought maybe going topless was the right move. Maybe I could get away with pushing her patience just a little further.
“Thirsty?” I crossed to the minibar to grab two bottles of water, and held one out.
She looked at it, then back at me. “Why’d you text me to come here if you were going to see me at the arena anyway?”
