I turn my phone off and get up, opening my blinds, even though it’s a bit dark outside. Streetlights illuminate everything and the purple-colored Jeep is still in the driveway across the street.
I bite my lip as hundreds of thoughts run through my mind. Should I go over there and see if it’s them? I mean, it might not be, and instead I’ll make a fool of myself. Maybe I’m making a big deal out of nothing. Crashing against my sleeping bag, rubbing my temples a bit, my phone buzzes. I smile and answer the video call.
“Hello?”
“Couldn’t wait till you were at the beach.” Her silliness causes me to let out a low chuckle. “Anyway, how are you?” she asks excitedly, and I momentarily forget all the stuff I was thinking about.
“Well, the house is unnecessarily huge and high-class, but it makes sense since Josh picked it—”
She interrupts me. “No, girl, I asked howyouare. Not the house.”
My heart stutters. She looks at me, waiting as emotions jumble in my throat. “Good,” I squeak out before clearing my throat and repeating the word as she looks at me doubtfully. Previous events gather in my thoughts and Josh’s words circle in my head. “I had another panic attack today,” I mutter, and Jamie has concern crossing her features, the want to comfort me apparent in her eyes. “But I’m okay, honest. Freaked over some blood, nothing new.”
She sees right through me and shakes her head.
I over explain, I over apologize for things that aren’t my fault, I downplay my fears for the benefit of others, always.
She crosses her arms, setting the phone on top of her desk, little Whiskers climbing on his cardboard post behind her.
“B, it’s alright if you aren’t. Can I know what happened?”
I sigh, realizing my downplaying tactic didn’t work. It never does, yet I never stop.
Everything spills out of me even though I don’t want to burden her with it. The plane ride, the move, the incident with Josh. Her cheeks turn red and her eyebrows scrunch, causing me to look at her in confusion.
“Bianca, that wasn’t right for him to say. It was an accident.” She runs her hand through her hair.
“He doesn’t know. Besides, it’s not like he was yelling or something.”
She shakes her head again. “Doesn’t matter. And you better not feel ashamed about it. It wasn’t your fault, okay?”
I nod, not wanting to confess that I was feeling just that. Silence fills the room and I can’t even bear to look at her face.
“I love Mama Kate, but if he’s saying thesethings—”
I wave her off. “It was this one time. I get it. It must’ve freaked him out.”
She sighs and looks as if she wants to argue. “Fine, but if that becomes the new norm ...” She trails off and I nod.
I run my hands through my hair, my scalp feeling my emotions as I tug and pull with my fingers. She looks at me, running her hands down her face, the helplessness transmitting through the phone.
“Talk about something else?” I ask.
Jamie looks as if she wants to keep talking about the situation, but switches topics for my sake.
CHAPTER SIX
BIANCA
“Ineed you to sign here.” The movers pass the clipboard to Josh as they load our bubble-wrapped things into the new house. Mom puts her hands on Josh’s shoulders, a smile on her face.
A grin finds its way to mine too, seeing her happy, knowing she deserves it—even if it’s with someone whom I don’t particularly like. Turning to the house once again, I’m starting to feel like I’m losing my mind.
It’s been a week since we moved from Philly, and time has sped by. Yet, since that first day, the fuchsia-colored Jeep is nowhere to be seen. I’ve become stalkerish at this point, checking almost every day to see if it’s parked in the driveway, but nothing comes of it. I made it up—I must’ve—and while it gives me some sense of relief ...
I also feel disappointed, and I hate that I do.
Liam distanced himself fromme. He didn’t want anything to do with me. He had football and new friends—I wasn’t needed anymore. And here I am, still wishing that car I saw was Ana’s.
