“Thanks.” Her elegant fingers hug the warm mug as she takes a long sip. “Mm, perfect.”
“How was your date with Calder?” I grip my mug so tight, I’m afraid the handle will snap. “It sounded like you had fun.” I fail to keep the bitterness from my tone. Why do I care anyway? I don’t do commitments. Relationships aren’t for me, and I never sleep with the same woman twice. So why does Kady Sinclair have me wanting to break all my rules?
“Sorry if we were…” Her eyes stay fixed on her drink. “A little loud.”
A little? It’s like they were purposefully trying to keep me awake. Her sounds of ecstasy have been driving me wild, and no amount of hand relief could fix it.
“Don’t sweat it.” I shrug, trying to keep my cool. “You’re a free woman. You can do what you want.”
She nods with a vacant expression, swirling the liquid around her cup until her gaze abruptly zeroes in on me with an intensity that has my skin prickling. “Can I ask you something?”
“Shoot.”
“Why are you so against finding an omega?”
“I’ve already told you.” I exhale heavily. “I’m not the kind of alpha who settles down with one omega.”
“I’d like to understand your reasons better.” She puts her coffee on the counter and puts her hand on her hips. “So you’d prefer to sleep around forever like a fuckboy?” There’s no judgment in her voice, only curiosity.
“I’d hardly say I’m a fuckboy.” I snort. “I mean, I like pleasuring women, but being with only one omega? I don’t think I could give her what she’d need. I’m not bonding material.”
“Why do you think that?”
“I didn’t grow up in a loving home.” I take a sip of my coffee. “Being a black kid in the foster care system wasn’t easy. I got used to being on my own.”
“Yet you joined a pack?” She tilts her head, studying me like a psychiatrist does with a patient, making me squirm.
“That’s different.” I set down my mug, folding my arms in front of me. “They understand me. They accepted me for who I am.”
“And you think an omega couldn’t?”
“I wouldn’t know how to give an omega the attention she needs. An omega needs someone who can be there for her without question. It wouldn’t be fair to give her less than what she deserves.” I let out an exasperated sigh. “But at least I’m honest about who I am. I’m not leading anyone on.”
“Is that what you think I’m doing?” She rests a palm on her chest. “Leading them on?”
“Isn’t it?”
“I…” Her face falls. “We’re getting to know each other.”
“My packmates are serious about you.” My eyes meet hers. “This weekend has proved that. But you’ve already said that you don’t want a pack, so I’m struggling to understand why you’re even here. Aside from having very loud sex, of course.”
She raises her pointed chin defiantly. “They invited me here with no-strings for a fun weekend.”
“We both know that how they feel about you runs deeper than no-strings fun.” I laugh bitterly and step forward. It’s the closest I’ve allowed myself to get to her since we arrived at the cabin. “The more time you spend with them, the harder it’s going to be for them if you leave. Real feelings are at stake here. Feelings of people I care about. You may be an emotionless princess, but?—”
She jerks back like I slapped her. “Do you really think that’s who I am?” Her blue eyes flash with fury. “A privileged bitch who goes around planning to break alphas’ hearts for fun?”
“You’ve made what you want, or don’t want, very clear,” I lash out. “For months now, I haven’t seen Hale this happy. Riven bought you a fucking star, and Calder has been much less of an ass than usual. Do you really expect me to stand around and smile until you get tired of toying with them?”
“You’re wrong about me, Ezra. I didn’t plan this,” she raises her arms, waving them, “thing with your pack. I came here because I thought it would help me figure things out. I’d never set out to intentionally hurt anyone, though I wouldn’t expect you to understand that when fucking and running is your specialty.”
Ouch. It’s true, but it still stings, even though I shouldn’t care what she thinks.
She continues, shaking her head. “I thought you’d understand how I’m feeling better than anyone. How it feels to be so conflicted. To have your body say one thing and your brain say another.”
“And what makes you think I’d understand?” My voice has dropped to a husky rumble.
“Because I see how you look at me.” Her gaze pierces me. “You didn’t have to bring me to your pack during my heat spike. You should have taken me to the wellness center, like any other professor would. Also, from the moment we arrived, you’ve been avoiding me, yet you took it upon yourself to ask about my date with Calder. Maybe you should ask yourself who’s truly the one sabotaging your pack’s happiness. Is it me, or is it you?”
