My cheeks hurt from how long I’ve spent smiling. And my heart is so full with love for the girls around me.
The signature guilt attempts to slink its way in, trying to cloud my mood with thoughts of how badly I’d treat them in the past but I bat it away like a skilled pro now that I’ve learnt to deal with these difficult emotions better.
These past few months in the stadium have taught me a lot. And one crucial lesson I’ve learnt is that everyone in this world, well, everyone who isn’t genuinely evil, has some form of guilt they are carrying around. I don’t need to make it worse by projecting my stormy mood on our relationships anymore.
These incredible women tried in their own ways. It’s not their fault that we were all starving and exhausted or that we had just spent months surviving a brutal winter. We helped each other survive all these years with whatever energy we had to spare. The only difference is we now all have our sparkle back. Some of that sparkle is in the form of spikes but they all glitter in the right light regardless.
We’re a quirky bunch and I wouldn’t wish for anything different.
‘You alright there, Isla?’ Fauna whispers low enough not to draw attention to us.
God this girl. She’s been with me through so much that I couldn’t begin to explain to her how grateful I am.
‘Just feeling a little sentimental.’ I squeeze her hand. ‘Guess I’m a little emotional at seeing us all happy.’
‘I never thought I’d see the day,’ Luna smiles at me.
She looks so beautiful with her freshly dyed pink hair.
‘What?’
‘You being so happy. It suits you, Isla.’
‘Yeah, you’re practically glowing.’ Amelia nods.
‘Guys,’ I brush away a rogue tear. ‘Why have we all turned into soppy shites?’
‘It’s weird,’ Liz mumbles from where she's moved to sharpen her arrows with a beautiful new blade I haven’t seen before. Her words don’t fool me — I know a small part of her loves it too.
We all do in our own little ways. Plus, just because we're being soppy doesn’t mean we’re any weaker than we were yesterday. In fact I don’t think we’ve collectively been as strong as we are now. The healthy living conditions and three meals a day are doing wonders for our bodies and minds. Now our workouts last longer and we can push further without fear of exhaustion from our shitty diets.
This home has helped shape us into who we really want to be.
Chapter forty
Liam
‘Sit,’ Malcolm instructs me and his lap dog doesn’t waste any time before pushing me towards the chair.
Or more accurately, I’d describe it as a pathetic nudge. I’m a big guy — Pam’s roasties have helped with that fact — it is beyond me why twiggy over here even thought he could test his luck and nudge me. But I’m being good, making allies and all that so I’ll let it slide… for now.
‘No need to be embarrassed, mate. You gave it your best shot,’ I offer him some grace.
Me mam always said not to be a bully like my old man. She’d probably smack me over the head if she was still alive to see menow. I don’t know if being a killer comes under the category of being a bully but I don’t think it exactly falls under model citizen.
Does it make you a bad person if you kill a killer?
Na, surely not.
‘Shut it or else.’ Malcolm is staring at me, his left eye twitching and he presses his lips together.
‘You alright, mate?’ I ask, concerned. ‘Your eyes are doing something funny.’
The lapdog smothers a laugh.
‘Get out,’ Malcolm barks at the guy as he continues to stare at me with bug-like eyeballs.
‘Seriously, you might want to get one of your scientist friends to check that out for ya.’
