I covered my eyes. “It’s a bad idea.”
“No!” she laughed. “No way, I love it. Why do you want to drug him? Did he say a really dumb thing? Sometimes he does that, but I’ve never thought about drugging him for it. That is a great idea.”
I sighed, shaking my head. “No, I want…” I glanced down to my thighs as they tightened involuntarily. “I want to push myself, but I…I need to be the one who controls this.” Just like he said. Find our own path. I control it all. I control us. So, if we were going to take the next step, I needed to make sure that I was in complete control over all of our actions.
She was quiet a moment. “I am really proud of you, baby girl,” she told me sincerely, causing my stomach to warm. “Yes,we were trained in it. He should have a duffle under his bed, you know it?”
I nodded, instantly sliding off the bed to pull the duffle out that I knew was there. “Okay.”
“When you get inside, there should be an unused needle and a small vial in there, unlabeled. It’s our own concoction that we use to knock people out. Little of this, little of that. Anyway, that’s what we’re given during training.”
I found the unused syringe and vial, the liquid clear. “Okay, now what?”
She thought about it. “Fill it to 15ML, that should do it. Put him out for about two hours, so you’ll have to wait it out.”
I frowned, sitting back on my heels. “He woke me up with cold water.”
“He gave you a really small dose. You were never drugged before you two met. It was easier to wake you up.”
Oh.
I glanced towards Lucy again, thinking it through. “How will I get him to the bed?”
“Good old-fashioned dragging,” she beamed. “He doesn’t weigh more than 215, pure muscle, but you’ll do great. The height might get to you. Lift with your legs!” she rushed out.
“Who are you talking to?” I heard Everett ask, my heart slamming to a halt, eyes widening.
“Olivia,” she replied truthfully. “She’s thinking about rearranging. You’ve got this,” she told me and hung up.
I dropped the phone and turned back to the syringe and vial. She was right, I got this. I could do it. I was ready.
I was pretty sure I was ready.
I wanted to be ready.
~~~
My heart wouldn’t slow. Even Lucy was starting to feel theanxiousness that was wafting from me.
But I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t stop pacing. I couldn’t stop looking at the clock. I couldn’t stop rubbing my own arms, my hands, everything.
I could do this though. I could.
It was Everett.
I was going to drug him, tie him up, and then I would move at my own pace. Take what I wanted, just as he did.
I wanted to take this back from them. I wanted to own our sex-life again. I missed him. I missed the intimacy of what we had.
I flexed my hand, remembering how it felt to hold it around his throat, to watch the blood drip from his skin because of me. It had felt powerful.
I had felt powerful, and I wanted to keep feeling it. I was in control of all of this—
Lucy looked at the door, ears perked.
My heart stopped beating, my lungs stopped working.
Fuck.
