I deflated. “Some girl band, I think. All it says is ‘Come Rock’.”
He rose a brow in slight concern. “You want to go to a rock concert by a new band inthiscity?”
I gave him a look. “Not all of them are bad,Jake, and no.” I hesitated. “Not really,” I corrected. “Sometimes it’s fun to disappear into a crowd of people who actually like the same things you like.” Sometimes it’s nice to feel something other than guilt and anger.
He smiled. “Ah, I get it. The concert phenomenon. Everyone’s jamming to the same music, screaming the lyrics. You get a high from it. But,” he went on, leaning over the counter as if he was about to give me life-altering advice, “what if she’s not the girl to do it? What if her music sucks? What if ‘rock’ is actually just a bunch of people getting together to read slam poetry at theDesmond?”
I laughed lightly. “Then I guess I’ll go see some slam poetry.” If anything, it might be good inspiration for the novel I was supposed to be working on.
He chuckled and straightened. “You do that, but I don’t want to hear about it when you come back.” He gave me a knowing nod and headed off to go do whatever it was he did when he wasn’t serving drinks.
I turned back to my own drink and took another long swig, wincing at the slight taste of the cheap scotch under the flavor of Dr. Pepper. Why could they never stock wine here? Wine would be so nice.
I released a breath and glanced towards the tattered curtain. Steven never told me what he did here, but I knew it wasn’t good. I wasn’t stupid, and he wasn’t as great at hiding his injuries as I was at hiding mine.
Some days he came out with black eyes, other times he came out with money. My guess was he had some sort of gambling debt. He loved to gamble, which was one of the reasons I hid my own past from him.
I never asked about what happened behind that curtain and he never brought it up. I just tried to be the good little girlfriend he wanted and keep my mouth shut.
Why? I couldn’t fathom a guess. I was just that stupid, I guess.
I pushed my hair back and leaned over the counter as I pulled out my phone. I didn’t like being talked to here by anyone besides Jake. I lived alone with my dog in this city, and that’s how I preferred it. At least that’s what I was trying to convince myself of. It was easier than admitting how wrong I was and how badly I screwed my life up. Socially, at least.
Steven wanted me to move in, but even after three years together, I wasn’t ready for that. Honestly, I wasn’t sure if I would ever be ready to pull that trigger with him. I liked my own space. I liked having that one little sanctuary. Away from myoverbearing mother, away from my boyfriend. Just me and my space. Alone. Completely and utterly… alone.
I pulled up the book I had been working on and allowed myself to fall into the story, rather than the spiral of emotions I had been swallowing for as long as I could remember…suffocating on.
After a while, I started to wonder where he was. Almost 45 minutes had passed and that was long, even for him.
I looked up. Asking Jake was pointless, he never gave me anything other than a shrug, but he was busy helping a newcomer anyway. One I had never seen before.
The curse of a writer’s mind was how easy it was to notice everything. For instance, this male had a mess of dark brunette hair, darker than mine, shorter on the sides than on the top. He had long dark lashes, and a sharp jawline. He was wearing an expensive black pea coat with the collar slightly popped, and from where I sat, I could see some black ink crawling up his neck and tattoos on his hands, along with a single silver ring with what looked to be a raven imprinted into the metal.
He obviously came from money, and was more along the lines of ‘exclusive club’ material more than anyone else in this place, but here? He seemed out of place. And not just because of his expensive attire, but because of the mask he was wearing too. It covered the top half of his face and dripped down on his right side, clear to his jaw, hooking over it slightly.
It was all black, smooth like glass, and didn’t seem to be tied on with anything, telling me that it was made just for him.
Why was he wearing a mask in March? One of those wannabe creep types, I was sure. Someone who wanted to gather attention but wanted to come across as too terrifying to be approached.
The words ‘rich arrogant asshole with mommy issues’ came to mind.
Jake slid over a glass filled with what looked like liquid honeybefore heading my way.
“Need another?”
I nodded, glancing towards the red hanging cloth and back. “Yeah, make it a double please.”
“Coming right up.” He pulled out what I wanted from under the counter and grabbed a new glass, putting my used one back under the counter as if it were some magical portal cleaning dishes on command.
I turned back to my phone and released a breath, unsure of how I should continue with this one. The writer’s block was strong today. Too many things going on in my head to focus on the next words.
“What’s on your mind?”
I shrugged, sitting up straight. “I just don’t know how well this works,” I replied, mostly under my breath. “Can I run something by you?” I found his eyes in question.
“Always.”
“Okay,” I nodded matter-of-factly. “I think I sort of understand where she was going with this, but I need to see if it makes sense to anyone else.”
