If someone my age were to tell me they were going in to have a biopsy on their breast to determine if the mass shown on the mammogram and ultrasound was cancerous, I would likely tell them they were too young. That it’s not possible.
But we all know this is how cancer works. There’s no rhyme or reason. No explanation. It doesn’t skip the young and target the old. It doesn’t discriminate. Cancer is a cancer. And today, I’m one step closer to finding out if it picked me.
Please don’t let it have picked me.
Tears well in my eyes for what feels like the millionth time today. I don’t let them fall. I can’t. Once they start, I’m not sure they’ll ever stop, and I simply don’t have the time to drown in my tears today.
Miller’s name flashes on the dashboard again when I let the first call ring out. He’s not letting me off the hook.
I answer the call on the last ring before it would have gone to voicemail. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready for the stadium?”
“I should be sitting in the car beside you, but someone is a stubborn asshole right now.” He wanted to be here with me. I refused. I didn’t even have a chance to tell him when the appointment was before Chase and his big fat mouth spilled the beans. Their friendship is causing problems for my ability to keep secrets.
“You have a game tonight. You don’t need to be here. You have other things to focus on.”
“The fact you expect me to be able to focus on anything other than you right now proves how delusional you are.”
“Did you only call to insult me?”
He sighs heavily. “Are you sure you’re okay by yourself?”
It’s not just that he has a game tonight. I don’t want to put him through waiting for me to get done with the procedure. It hits too close to home with what happened to his sister. I can’t do that to him. I won’t. Even if he insists it doesn’t matter.
“Yes, I’m fine. Already parked and just waiting to walk in.”
“How much longer do you have?” I check the clock on the dash. I’m early because I was nervous but too anxious to go in any earlier than the required thirty minutes before my appointment time.
“Ten minutes. Distract me—how’s Cooper?”
“This dog, I swear.” I tune out while he launches into a story about the golden puppy’s latest reign of terror.
“You need to send him to one of those puppy training camps.”
“But then he won’t be here. I don’t want him to feel like I’m shipping him off to some kennel again. He just got out.”
“Mills, he’s barely six months old and you’re gone literally all the time anyway. You don’t have time to train him, and you have to board him or have someone watch him when you’re gone, so you might as well kill two birds with one stone and board himwith a trainer. Then after the season you can spend all the time in the world with him and get the puppy snuggles.”
“The season’s almost over, but you’re right,” he sighs. “It’s really annoying, you know that?”
“Sorry my being practical is annoying to you.”
“You should work on that. No one needs to be practical all the time.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Your time’s up.”
“Yeah.” We sit in silence for a few more minutes before I speak again. “I should go in.” The clock on the dash is mocking me. I’m officially two minutes late.
“You’ve got this, Gabrielle.”
“Don’t call me that. Call me something else.” Calling me by my full and proper name adds to the seriousness of this situation and it’s not something I can handle.
“Okay, Gabadoodledoo. Turn the car off and get inside. If you change your mind, text me. I’ll be there in no time.”
“You need to get to the stadium before Coach gets mad.”
“I’m at the stadium now. Been sitting in the truck talking to you watching everyone else go inside.”
