“Sure you were,” I say, a little grumpier than I mean to.
She frowns observing me for a second before rolling her eyes, putting away the rest of the items and sitting back down to finish her meal.
“What?” Now I am annoyed, because where I’m passive aggressive, Sloane is just aggressive and that eye roll was designed to land like a punch. She looks at me and raises her eyebrows as if to ask if I really want to know what she thinks. “WhatSloane? Just say what you want to say.” I feel exhausted and not entirely sure I actually want to know what she has to say, but I'd rather hear it now than whatever inappropriate moment she chooses.
“You’re being cranky to me because of your fight with Gen,” she shrugs, as if it’s obvious and maybe it is obvious. I assume Gen’s already told her everything, they're basically attached at the hip, and from the way Sloane’s looking at me I know she’s already made up her mind that I’m the bad guy.
“Is there more?” I ask, feeling my voice becoming more frustrated.
“You should apologize to her.”
“Apologize for what? Asking her to tell the truth?”
She moves to the sink, clearing her plate.
“It’s not her truth to tell,” she mumbles under her breath, but I know she intended for me to hear it.
“What do you mean?” I ask incredulously. “You’re telling me she should just keep this huge secret, one that would shake up Olivia’s life completely, forWill?” I spit his name, venom dripping from my voice. “The same Will who's been shitty to basically every person I’ve cared about since I’ve known him?”
“Sort of!” Sloane spits back and I can see the fire that takes my sister over start to light, the one that’s gotten her in trouble so many times before. I gape at her, shocked that she of all people would be on his side and not mine. “Look, I have to go. I’m going to be late.” She grabs her keys off the counter, bending over to put on her boots.
“Late for what?” I ask, too much suspicion in my voice but I’m angry, and not only is she not in school right now, she’s also unemployed. She freezes for a split second as if she wishes she didn’t say anything. I splay my hands on the counter, frustration coursing through me.
“Late forwhat, Sloane?” I say again, already expecting the worst. She shuts her eyes and pulls in a deep breath standing up straight.
“I have a thing…with Mom.”
I feel my jaw lock, my thumbs hitching under the counter that I’m now squeezing, my knuckles turning bleach white. I want to scream, to run—I want to stop my sister from the chaos that will follow when she allows this woman back into her life.
“Why?” I say through gritted teeth.
“You know what Grant—” she starts, that flame now fully ablaze, as she grabs her coat. “Not all of us are constantly holding people to an entirely impossible standard. Normal people can’t just decide if someone is good or bad likethat.” She snaps her fingers in front of my face. “People change Grant, people have reasons they do things. Maybe they don’t want to share those things with thegatekeeper of morality.” She gestures, staring daggers at me.
“People like Will, people like Connie…” Anger seizes through me burning its way up my throat. “They don’t justchangeSloane. They don’t get to use their issues as an excuse for fucking up someone’s life.” I feel the volume of my voicebefore I register it, my throat aching with the outburst, but Sloane does not back down. Just like always, she squares her shoulders and stares me down. Surprisingly though, her voice has a softer tone than it did before, as if she’s worried I might break—and I might.
“Sometimes things are morally grey, Grant. Do I think Gen should be protecting Will? No. Absolutely not.” I feel my shoulders droop, slightly relieved. “But—” Sloane starts and I instantly feel myself tense again. “Will was Gen’s person for a really,reallylong time. That was her best friend, so maybe she thinks protecting him is more important than the truth.Maybethere’s a whole lot of pain under that secret that she knows he’s not ready to face.” I shake my head and I see the frustration flaring in her eyes. “What makes Will less worthy of empathy, Grant? Just because he’s fucked up? What about mom? Why is she okay to abandon and we aren’t?” Tears bloom behind my sister's eyes.
“She was ourmom, Sloane.” I know she can hear the betrayal in my voice, the anger and pain bubbling under the surface.
Sloane’s jaw hardens. “Sheisour mom.”
“This is a mistake. Don’t let her in.” I drop my voice to a softer level, wanting to protect that innocence, that way my sister has always gotten to look at the world and I never have.
“Don’t let her in.” She lets out a sardonic laugh. “That’s your advice? To just keep pushing her away?” She squeezes her eyes shut and I’m a bit surprised by how angry she is. “Grant, you can’t just keep everyone at arm's length and expect things to get better for you.” Her fingers clasp around the bag strap hanging on her shoulder. I feel my defenses climb back up, aware that my sister is taking everyone's side but mine.
“I let people in. I let you in—I let my friends in. For fuck’s sake this entire argument is because IletGen in.” Anger flows between the two of us and Sloane grabs her keys from the counter.
“This entire argument is because yourefuseto let anyone in.” Her voice is calm but angry as she shifts past me heading to the front door. “Apologize to Gen, Grant,” she says without a goodbye, throwing the door closed behind her.
The masquerade mask is almost suffocating as Gen walks down the steps of her apartment. The slits of her long silky white skirt expose her toned, tanned legs as she walks toward me, and what looks like a white scarf is expertly wrapped around her chest in a way that leaves slivers of her soft brown skin exposed.
It isn’t lost on me that, even just seeing her from several yards away, the weight that’s been on my chest all day feels a little bit lighter. My fight with Sloane has been on repeat in my mind but now, it feels farther away, her words dimming with every step Gen takes.
“Hi,” she smiles up at me, the same shy smile she had that first night standing outside my apartment and it’s like every detail of the past few months comes rushing back to me, the Roman armor that Sloane somehow convinced Andy to snag from the theater department constricting as I suck in a breath.
“You...” I let out a low whistle that has a pink flush surging where Gen’s mask meets her cheeks. I look into those dark brown eyes, and lose myself. “You’re everything.”That realization opens something inside me that I thought I had healed long ago. Losing her would ruin me.
I pull her arms around my neck and feel her melt a little, the hesitance she had a second ago washing away. “You ready?”
