‘It will certainly have to be after Christmas,’ said Seraphina thoughtfully. ‘Otherwise, Tobias will want to know why Lucy is not there. I am thinking January, though she will be seven months gone by then. Let us hope she is not showing too much. Though these new high-waisted dresses will aid us. One of my younger sisters, Amelia, is a stickler for the latest Paris fashions. And she was well into her sixth month before anyone noticed.’
‘Actually, everyone was being polite, Mama. Great-aunt Meredith told me she thought Aunt Amelia had been overindulging on chocolate and needed more exercise,’ quipped Lucy with a grin at me, and I stifled theurge to giggle.
So it was all decided. The contract was produced by Mr Chadwick at the end of our meeting. And after Max had read it over and pronounced it ‘acceptable’, it was duly signed by each of us—sealing our fate and that of Lucy’s child.
All that remained was for me to write a letter to Elizabeth (and a separate letter to Jane), informing them of our arrival date in Kent. Max and I would write to our loved ones announcing the good news, and he would inform our staff that I was in the family way. Later on, they would be told that I would be travelling to Ashbury Manor for my confinement and taking Lucinda with me as my companion. (They did not need to know we were going to Kent rather than Steventon!)
In the coming weeks, I would book an appointment with my dressmaker to make some adjustable dresses and a corset that padding could be inserted into.
We would also begin to prepare our home for the new arrival—namely choosing a room for a nursery and decorating it. I was quite looking forward to that. Max’s home had undergone a thorough renovation in the summer before I had moved in, but of course, he had not factored a nursery into his plans. However, as he cautioned me in one of our discussions, we did not know if it was a boy or a girl. So the colour scheme would have to be neutral. However, Isuggested bunny rabbits for the decoration, and Max agreed with a smile, saying that he remembered having those in his own nursery. I replied, with some measure of disbelief, ‘How on earth can you remember that?’
And he assured me, quite solemnly, that he had anexcellentmemory.
***
Dearest Harriet,
Please excuse my lack of pleasantries, but I have some strange but exciting news to tell you. The other week, I was feeling a little under the weather, so Max insisted on calling for the doctor. After an examination, he pronounced me with child! I can hardly believe it, especially after all my declarations that I never wanted to be a mother. It looks like I shall indeed be one this coming February.
Max is quite beside himself with joy, and his happiness is infectious. Indeed, he is running around like a rooster, crowing his head off about it. He is making me laugh, but at the same time, I have shed some quiet tears as my emotions are quite unstable at present. As to how this happycircumstance occurred, I have no idea as we have been very careful in that department. Max used a French letter every time we ...
No, no, that was too much information! She did not need to know the ins and outs of how I became with child. No doubt she was well aware of them, having had one herself. I took another sheet of paper and wrote the letter out again, minus the last two sentences.
I know you will be naturally concerned about my health, dearest, but let me reassure you that I am quite well. I will also have no need of your assistance, either now or for my confinement. Max will see to it that I have the best care. So pleasedo notstart making alternative arrangements as I know you are planning to have Christmas in London with Evan’s family.
The last thing I wanted was Harriet racing up here to look after me at Christmas or offering to help out with my confinement in the months afterwards, so I thought I would head her off at the pass.
It was easier than trying to explain that I would be in Kent staying with Elizabeth and Edward Austen. She wouldbe utterly confused as to why I would go all the way down there when I had a perfectly good home to give birth in. I ended the letter with:
I will write again with further updates and eagerly await your wise counsel on the best types of food to eat or avoid!
Love and hugs,
Fliss x
A congratulatory reply from Harriet was imminent. That was par for the course. And I had to involve her in some aspect, hence asking for her advice on nourishment (and expectant women were always concerned about things like that, were they not?).
However, despite my insistence that she not concern herself, Harriet was a worrier. I knew she would start firing letters off to me on a regular basis to reassure me on every detail. She had spent twenty years living with me and knew intimately my thoughts and fears upon the subject of childbirth.
Oh, how I wished I could tell her what was happening, but I had given my word to everyone that I would not. I would have to manage the situation somehow, as Seraphinawas doing with Tobias.
Yet it felt very wrong that my dressmaker would know the truth of the matter, but not my own sister!
***
With the plan locked in place and the contract signed, there was markedly less tension, and Mr Chadwick’s placating presence had managed to alleviate the situation further. Seraphina, it seemed, was finished with accusing me and deemed our arrangement a suitable ‘fix’.
A few days later, we saw her and Lucinda off back to York. Seraphina even gave me a peck on the cheek before climbing into the carriage, which was unheard of under any circumstances.
Lucinda too was considerably more composed than when she had arrived. We had taken some long walks in the garden, where she confessed her gratitude to me and Max. There was some self-condemnation over her naivety and stupidity, which I swiftly dismissed, saying there should be none of that, that it was pointless blaming herself and she needed to focus on keeping well for the coming months. She did not mention Harrington, and I did not ask. Any relationship between them now was surely hopeless.
‘So that is that,’ I said to Max as we stood, wavingto the carriage. After the upheaval and delirium of the last week, I felt strangely lacklustre. ‘I suppose all we can do now is wait and wonder.’
‘Wait, wonder, andprepare,’ said Max, putting his arm around my waist and holding me close. ‘There is much to do, dearest. You will not have time to brood. And we will enjoy our time together all the more as everything will change when ...’
He did not need to finish his sentence as I knew very well that come February, our lives would never be the same again.
***
