If I were Bear Grylls, I’d probably make it on foot, but I’m not. Someone’s going to have to drive me to the station. Either Bailey, his dad, or Lewis. Out of the three, his dad is the safest option. All that remains now is to broach the subject with Bailey and come up with a believable excuse as to why I’m leaving on his birthday. Strangely enough, now that I’ve made the decision to go home, I fall into a peaceful sleep.
I wake from something solid pressing against me. One of Bailey’s arms is flung over my hip, and he’s snuggled up against me.Probably only to keep warm,I think cynically.
I’m under no illusion that what’s going on is the love affair to end all love affairs. I’ve just been a project for him to work on—something to fix, like the owl with a broken wing. Well, I’m not going to hop around after him like a pathetic creature desperate for his love. I lift his arm off me, slide out from under the covers, and quickly get dressed in jeans and a warm jumper. Crumpet looks up at me and wags his tail.
‘We’re leaving, buddy, and not a moment too soon,’ I whisper to him.
I’m tiptoeing around, picking up items of clothing, and packing my bag as silently as I can when there’s a sleepy grunt of someone waking up behind me.
Bailey’s sleep-filled voice sounds in the darkness. ‘What are you doing?’
Ooops. ‘Er, packing.’
‘What for? It’s bloody early. Come back to bed.’
‘I think I’m going to go home actually. Do you think your dad could drive me to the station this morning?’
That pours cold water on him. Bailey sits up in bed and switches on the bedside light. He’s wearing a blue T-shirt with ‘Merry Christmas’ and a family of dancing gingerbread men on it. He peers at me blearily. ‘Is this about what we discussed last night?’
‘It wasn’t much of a discussion.’
He pats the side of the bed. ‘Sit down.’
I sit.
‘Why don’t you tell me what you want out of this?’
If Kirk was here, I know exactly what he’d say: ‘Ho ho ho. Nice move, Bails. Get her to go first.’
Fine, if he wants to know. ‘I’m willing to rethink my self-imposed single status for you,’ I say formally.
Bailey looks amused. ‘You make it sound like going out with me would be a prison sentence.’
I lift my chin. ‘What about you?’
‘I haven’t really thought about it.’
I look at him, aghast. ‘You haven’t?’
‘Not really. I was just living in the moment.’
I groan inwardly, feeling tricked into revealing too much. He really is the worst.
‘You’re a man-child,’ I say, my voice wavering.
‘That’s unfair.’
‘It’s true. You’re living in some Christmas fairy-tale bubble. It’s not reality.’
‘I wasn’t aware I was doing that ...’
‘You have no idea what it’s like to grow up feeling unwanted and unloved.’
Bailey purses his lips and looks at me with what I judge to be pity.
‘You’re right, I don’t. I have to wonder, though. Is it me you want or my family?’
I open my mouth and shut it again. I can’t deny Bailey’s awesome family is a powerful drawcard. Would I want him if he didn’t come with that?
