And there is no putting this genie back in the bottle.
24
RAINA
“My sister,” Kaleb says.
“Kaleb, listen to me. We can explain. We can talk about this,” Alex tries again.
As I look around, I realize it’s kind of hard to explain. We’re in the Cinnamon Playroom. The bed was made for sex. The entire room is decorated with decadence in mind. There are straps on the walls, a leather swing hangs from the ceiling in the eastern corner, and Lord knows I’ve ridden that thing enough times that the guilt and the shame are probably written all over my face.
The guys’ faces, too. This place smells of sex and sin, and Kaleb’s no fool.
“What’s there to talk about?” my brother growls. “You three finally did it, eh? The one thing I warned you against. I told you my sister is off-limits.”
“Kaleb, I wanted it,” I say, trying to cool him down.
He raises a hand to stop me before I get too close. “No, you don’t mean that.”
“Kaleb, listen to me. I wanted this. Alex, Vincent, Max and I… we’ve got something, something different. It’s serious, it’s not just…” I pause and motion at everything around us. “It’s not just this. We’re together.”
“Together,” he scoffs and shakes his head. “You have got to be fucking kidding me. You must be out of your damn mind.”
“Hey, Kaleb, take it easy,” Vincent says, moving closer, his hands up in a peaceful gesture. “Cool your heels, man. It’s not what you think.”
“Raina means everything to us,” Alex adds.
Instead of calming him, Alex’s comment sets Kaleb off. He whirls around, trembling with rage as he beholds his mentor.
“How dare you?” Kaleb says. “How fucking dare you? I know what you’re like, Alex! I know you three love sharing women, screwing around, dom and sub stuff and all that crap! And not once did I judge you for it, not once. But then you had to drag my sister into it. All the women in the world weren’t enough? You had to ruin Raina, too?”
“They didn’t?—”
“Shut up!” Kaleb cuts me off with a snarl. “Just shut up, Raina. I figured you were going through some things after that whole mess with Jeremy, but this? This is beneath you. How could you?”
Max isn’t taking my brother’s reaction well. “Kaleb, you need to take a deep breath and be very careful about what you say next.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah,” Max replies. “Everything your sister did with us was consensual. She’s a grown woman, a free woman, an incredible woman. And she has the right to do as she pleases, regardless of whatever sanctimonious judgment you have to express on the matter. And what we have, it’s not just sex, man, it’s a lot deeper.”
“I’m sure it’s deep with the three of you,” Kaleb snaps. “You destroyed her. Raina…” He pauses and gives me a sour look. “You were a good girl, Raina.”
I’m shaking like a leaf, the pain spreading through my chest as the words roll off his tongue, each stinging me with a venomous shot. It burns and it aches everywhere as I stare at him in disbelief.
“Kaleb…”
“How could you let them do this to you? Turn you into some--””
“Kaleb, stop before I stop you!” Alex intervenes, his voice loud and heavy, his rage pulsating out of him in palpable waves. “Don’t say what you’re about to say, because we both know that’s just the anger talking. It’s not you.”
Kaleb shakes his head and runs his fingers through his hair. He takes several deep breaths to regain some semblance of control over himself. But I feel the anger coming off him, the disillusionment, the shame. Or is that mine?
I shouldn’t feel shame.
None of this is shameful, but Kaleb doesn’t understand that. For a long time before I even came to Haus of Sin, I didn’t understand it either. I felt guilty for wanting Alex, Vincent, and Max, for lusting after them.
“My own sister,” Kaleb sighs, giving me a look of disgust. “The perfect Raina Redford, a whore for my best friends.”
