Chapter 25
Atendril of steam rose from the teacup, reminding Mayra of a ladder climbing to heaven. She hoped her own ascension would be as delicate as the steam’s was. Somehow, she doubted it. Her whole life had been hard. Why should her end be any different?
She felt as if she were an actress in a play, as if she were watching events happen from outside. It was easier that way, easier than internalizing all the hurt.
They’ve betrayed you, the cold voice whispered.Used you. Set you up. And all along, you’ve played into their hands. So what are you gonna do now?
I’m going to end all this. End the pain. End the suffering.
She wouldn’t go back to Vanfia, not for anything in the seven known galaxies. Not even for him.
Mayra watched Nojan as he put things away in the galley. His movements were sure, his body a collection of muscles that all worked in perfect harmony. He was everything she could have hoped for in a male, in a partner.
And that is exactly why they picked him, the voice whispered.They knew you wouldn’t be able to resist him.
Could it all be true, everything the voice had hinted at? Suddenly, she couldn’t see it any other way. Her betrayal was reality, written large for her to see. Was that a secretive glance exchanged between the two lovebirds? And the way Sanri folded her hands in front of her just now. Was that some kind of code? A message to her lover?
Mayra realized it was time to act. Every second she waited was a second that brought her closer to Vanfia. Her delay gave them opportunity to plot against her, to restrain her if necessary, even to lock her back in the tiny compartment until they reached Rantel’s planet. That, she couldn’t allow.
She rose, picking up the teacup and heading for the small galley sink. Nolan watched her as she walked, but when she stared at him blankly, he looked away. Carefully, she poured the tea down the drain, then reached for the knife that sat in the drying rack beside the sink. Quick as the devil, she snatched it up and had it at her own throat.
“Mayra, what are you doing?” Nojan lunged toward her but she shuffled backward, pressing the knife into her delicate skin.
“Don’t come any closer,” she hissed. “You’ve done enough damage. Just let me die in peace.”
“Why are you doing this? I don’t understand.” His tone sounded so sincere that it gave her pause. Was that genuine concern she heard?
He’s a professional, the cold voice whispered.What good is an actor who isn’t convincing?
“You don’t understand? You don’t?” Mayra felt the tears start to fall but did her best to keep her tone level, to not let emotion overwhelm her. “You can’t understand why I wouldn’t want to be returned to Rantel to serve the rest of my life as his punching bag who can tell the future? I’m sorry it comes as a surprise to you, but I’ve figured out your nefarious little plot. I must confess to being impressed by the lengths you all went through to convince me to fuck you. It must irritate Rantel to no end to have to work this hard. I’m sure he’ll punish me for it when I get back.”
“What are you saying?” Nojan’s eyes were wide, his expression confused. “We’re going to Vartik, not Vanfia. I’d never return you to Rantel.”
“Sure, you’re taking me to Vartik, a planet full of a species that’s been entirely wiped out, right? That was a clever little story to earn my trust, to make me feel like we both had secrets. But it was all bullshit, wasn’t it?”
“Put the knife down, Mayra, and we can talk about this.”
“Too late,” she whispered. “I thought you cared about me. I should have known better. I’m not worthy of your attentions, I get that, but you could have just left me alone. Instead, you made me feel beautiful.” A sob broke through on the last word, and she knew she had to act or risk being immobilized by emotion.
“You are beautiful. You’re the loveliest thing I’ve ever seen.” Nojan’s voice cracked, and Mayra paused. Were those tears in his eyes?
Suddenly, her arms were grabbed from behind her. “Put the knife down,” Sanri growled from behind her. Although the woman’s hands were on her arms, ostensibly to pull them away from her throat, instead they were adding steady pressure.
The knife began digging into the flesh around her throat. She could feel blood beginning to bead and spill.
“Sanri, let her go!” Nojan raised his hands but stood there, unsure of how to resolve the situation.
“I’m trying to help,” the dark-haired woman grunted. Mayra felt the pressure increase, felt the woman press the weapon deeper even as she pretended to do the opposite. Soon, the knife would sever her artery and it would be lights out.
Let go, the cold voice whispered.Stop fighting. This is what you want. Give in.
Mayra closed her eyes, about to do as the voice suggested. Then she heard Sanri’s soft chuckle, and suddenly, she knew she couldn’t go out, not like this. She couldn’t let this bitch win.
With all the strength in her, she pushed back. Sanri wasn’t expecting the sudden fight and she lost her grip on Mayra’s arms. It was the only opportunity she needed. Turning as quickly as she could, Mayra slammed the knife into Sanri’s stomach.
The raven-haired woman stared at her with eyes wide. Blood was pouring out of the wound, covering Mayra’s hands and the shirt she was wearing.No wonder the hands had looked familiar in the vision, she thought idly.They’d been my own hands.
“What did you do?” Nojan pulled her away, moving to staunch Sanri’s wound.
