“Tell that to professionals, man.” Mon laughed, still without looking up from his phone. “But I think there’s something you’re not telling me and Scott, and as your friends, we just want to make sure everything’s okay between you and David.”
“Oh, David and I are fine,” Jay assured Mon, which wasn’t a lie. He and Davidwerefine. He and David even laughed at the church when Jay made a joke about having a phone charger at the ready because, ha-ha,cordsponsor.
“So it’s Marina you have a problem with.”
“Jay, you aren’t paying attention to me,” Scott, the thirty-plus year-old man,whined. There was something about hanging out with his high school friends that brought out their younger selves—they still liked to wheedle each other and tease mercilessly. It was childish, but nostalgia hit Jay hard whenever they were together. He missed it.
“Oh my, I would never ignore my talent! Please, sir, pose by the ice cream cart,” he said, as he and his friend shuffled over to the ice cream stand near the seating area. One hour down, one more to go. But what else were guests supposed to do in between the 3:00 p.m. ceremony and the 7:00 p.m. reception start? Scott was being petulant, insisting he would look better by the window. “I don’t know how Ava stands you.”
“My girlfriend loves me. But I love her more, and standing each other is the least that we do,” Scott said proudly, his already handsome face almost aglow with the love of someone Jay thought was a cool person. It mystified him, how easy it was for his friend to say it out loud. Even David had just done it, in front of God and all the witnesses, and there had been zero hesitation in his voice when he made his vows. Not only was he willing to spend an ungodly amount of money to say it out loud (Luisa’s wedding wasexpensive, and that was without renting out a second ballroom as a holding room), he was willing to stake his name, his life, his reputation on it. Because wasn’t that the point of all of them being invited?
Terrifying. There were no guarantees in love, even less in marriage. More so in a country that had no divorce law.
“I could never,” Jay said out loud, keeping the camera up and seeing Scott’s change from sentimental softness to surprise, then amusement, all through the lens of his camera. “Sorry. I’m happy for you, really, all that standing. Woo, go team ScAva.”
“That is a terrible couple name. It sounds like a skin disease.” Scott winced.
“You know, Jay,” Mon piped up from where he was still sitting like an old Dad watching his kids play in the pool. “For someone so good at capturing human emotions with a camera, you get very awkward when feelings are brought up.”
“Hey, hey,hey.” The need to defend himself rose quick and hot. He could stand to be berated for being terrified of a woman he barely knew, but not for being emotionally unavailable. Because he washere, wasn’t he? “Just because I’m not in a stable, long-term relationship like you guys, doesn’t mean I’m—”
“You asked if David had a cold when he was sniffing at the altar,” Mon pointed out.
“The pandemic isn’t over, I was being cautious.”
“You made little beep boop noises when he kissed Marina in front of everyone at the church,” Scott added.
“I was trying to be entertaining!”
“You haven’t been in a serious relationship since Selena.”
“Okay, yes,” was all he said, frowning at his friends to get them to stop. He wasn’t in the mood to revisit that, especially not right now. “And because it was Selena, you know why I don’t want to be in a serious relationship. Plus, I’m between here and Hong Kong, I don’t really see myself settling down anywhere anytime soon. And I have other priorities, you guys know that.”
Her name was Luna, she was nearly four now, and the love of his life. Unfortunately for Jay’s nightlife, his niece had an early bedtime, and according to his sister, “can’t party,” which Jay thought was a real shame because Luna had inherited her ninong’s dance skills. But Mom trumped Ninong every time, and Jay was going to have to settle for that.
He smiled when Scott and Mon studied him with what he could only describe as concern. It was sweet of them, worrying about him, but Jay was fine. “Also I still date. I datequitea lot, thanks. I’ve seen the insides of more condom—”
“Ew.” Scott wrinkled his nose.
“Condominumunits than most real estate agents. The market for condominiums is wild, guys. Apparently the market is hot and I’m losing money because I’m not making it,” he said quickly. But there was absolutely no shame in his voice. He liked going out, liked meeting new people, and making them feel special. He actually preferred flitting from place to place. It was exciting, and fun, even when his back hurt the next day because he was thirty-five and decrepit. “But it’s too near Luna’s school, I would never give it up.”
“We’re talking about emotional vulnerability, not sex,” Mon reminded him. “Not the same thing.”
“Also, Luna goes to school now?” Scott gasped. “But she’s a baby!”
“It’s pre-school, so everyone is a baby.” Jay chuckled. “But I’m fine. You guys are great at making other people happy, it’s just not me.”
Jay didn’t get to see Mon and Scott as often as they saw each other—the two of them had gone on to study in the same university, had their own barkada without him, saw each other often because of work—Jay had been in Hong Kong for the longest time, and was only starting to get more time for friends since coming back. He’d missed a lot of random dinners out, coffee invitations and big trips out of the country because of work, because of family. But he was there when they asked him to be. He felt guilty sometimes about being a bare minimum friend, but he made his commitments. His friends understood that.
“Speaking of serious relationships,” he said, ordering himself a cone of barako ice cream. It would have to do, for now. “Where are your better halves?”
Mon and Scott gave each other looks, a silent communication done easily by those who have known each other for as long as they had. And Jay, being their friend for about the same amount of time, could understand every word. “Is he deflecting?”
“Yes.”
“Should we let him?”
“Yes. Because we like him. Also do you think I look good in this barong?”
