"You defended yourself against an assassin. That's not the same as getting someone killed."
"Carver let him in. Carver is the reason that man came through my door. But I'm the one who bashed his skull in with a lamp." Her voice is hollow. "And now I find out I was right all along. That I knew something was wrong and I ignored it."
I sit beside her, close but not touching. "You didn't have proof. You had a feeling. That's not enough to accuse a federal agent."
"It was enough to save my life. If I'd ignored that feeling, if I hadn't grabbed the lamp, I'd be dead." She looks at me. "My gut told me something was wrong with Carver, and I didn't listen. What else am I not listening to?"
"What do you mean?"
"This. Us. Being here." She gestures around the cabin. "I've been so focused on feeling safe, on falling for you, that I stopped paying attention to the danger. What if my instincts are trying to tell me something now, and I'm ignoring them again?"
"Are they? Is something telling you this is wrong?"
She's quiet for a long moment. "No. Being with you feels right. But so did trusting the marshals, and look how that turned out."
I take her hand, threading my fingers through hers. "The marshals failed you. Carver betrayed you. But I'm not them. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you."
"You can't promise that."
"I can promise that I'll die trying to prevent it."
"That's not better." Her eyes fill with tears she refuses to let fall. "That's actually worse, Deck. I don't want you to die for me. I want you to live with me."
"Then that's what I'll do."
"You don't know that. You can't know that." She pulls her hand free and stands, pacing to the window. "Everything I thought I knew about my situation so far was wrong. The safe houses weren't safe. The people protecting me were selling me out. The only reason I'm alive is because I trusted my gut when it mattered and got lucky with a heavy lamp."
"You weren't lucky. You were prepared."
"I was terrified. I acted on instinct, not training." She turns to face me. "What happens when instinct isn't enough? What happens when they send someone I can't stop with a piece of furniture?"
"That's why I'm here. That's why you've been training."
"Training won't matter if they know where we are. If Carver gave them this location?—"
"Taylor kept him out of the loop on your transport. He suspected something was off, which is why he handled it personally."
"Taylor suspected?" Some of the tension leaves her shoulders. "He knew about Carver?"
"He had concerns. Couldn't prove anything, but he was careful. That's why he brought you here himself instead of delegating to his team."
She processes this, her expression jumping from fear to something more complicated. "So there's a chance Carver doesn't know where I am."
"There's a good chance. But we can't be certain until he talks, and he's not cooperating with the interrogation."
"Of course he isn't. The Castellanos would kill him and everyone he loves if he gave them up." She laughs bitterly. "I almost feel sorry for him. Almost."
"Don't waste sympathy on a man who sold you out for money."
"I'm not sympathizing. I'm recognizing that everyone in this situation is trapped." She returns to the couch and sits beside me again, closer this time. "Me by the Castellanos. Carver by his own greed. You by your need to protect everyone."
"I don't need to protect everyone. Just you."
"That's not true and we both know it. You built Guardian Peak to protect people. You take assignments like mine because you can't stand the thought of someone getting hurt when you could prevent it." She touches my face. "It's one of the things I love about you. It's also the thing that scares me most."
"Why?"
"Because one day you might have to choose between saving yourself and saving someone else, and I already know which one you'll pick."
