An array of emotions runs over his face too quickly for me to catch. Then he nods. “Sure.”
He offers his arm as I stand up, leading us down the hall and out onto the lite patio. Everything beyond the area is dark and peaceful. The infinity pool glows in the darkness. Not even that can hold my attention as he comes to a stop.
A camera man followed us. So I can’t ask him directly about what happened at the carriage house because that isn’t a place I should have been in the first place.
“Did I do something wrong? On our date?” I ask. I inhale a steadying breath as my eyelashes brush my cheek, and I gather the courage to look at him and view the rejection I’m sure I’ll find in his eyes.
My palms grow clammy. My heart races. And my breath is caught somewhere in my lungs as I wait for his response.
“Wrong?” he repeats, sounding as if he’s genuinely perplexed, and I finally lift my eyes from his feet to his face. I watch as his brow furrows and his eyes narrow, clearly trying to process what I just said. His confusion’s almost palpable, and I can see him struggling to make sense of it all.
I shift on my feet and glance at the camera in our faces. I wish it wasn’t here.
“Yeah, after—you’re just…” I press my lips together, feeling suddenly foolish for asking to talk to him.
“No, not at all. It isn’t you?—”
“It’s you?” I lift an eyebrow. I’ve heard that one before. While standing at the altar and staring at my would-be alpha.
“Yes—No,” he says, sounding torn. He reaches for my hands and grips my fingers lightly. “Lilah, you know I came here for love. Making the right decision that isn’t driven by…”
Hormones. He was going to say hormones. His quick glance at the camera tells me everything I need to know. Like I told Miles. Lust and love are not the same thing. Elliottseems to know that. Even if my heart cracks a bit at the knowledge.
I pull my fingers from him and step back. Forcing a smile to my lips that I can only hope it looks steadier than it feels, I nod. “Of course. Yeah. You should find someone that can make you happy. That’s what this show is about, right?”
His brows furrow. Before he can say another word, Tamika and Tyler come outside. They are each in high spirits that feel at odds with how my heart feels like it’s breaking. When they join us the conversation flows around me.
I’m here. But I’m not. Like a rock in a river, the water continues to move and run down the river, but the rock stays stuck. Continuously pounded against by the current that wants to beat it down.
Elliott’s eyes feel like they are burning a hole through me as he chats with the other two. I nod and smile when expected. When Tamika reaches out and grasps Elliott’s bicep, I can’t take it anymore.
Falling back a step, I mumble out a goodbye and escape into the house. I slip into the bathroom and lock the door behind me. My reflection stares back at me, regrets of falling for them shining in the depths of my eyes. How could Ashlyn ever think this show was a good idea for a broken heart? How could I start to believe her?
A knock sounds on the door, and I tell whoever it is I’ll be out in a moment. Silence follows, and I assume they’ve walked away. Inhaling, I release the sink and stand up. I’m not broken. No alpha can break me. That’s only within my power.
I will just have to guard my heart going forward.
Swinging the door wide, I squeak in surprise when Rafe’s on the other side, and he barges in, pushing me back inside. Then quickly shuts it behind him.
“What—?” I start. But my words are swallowed by him as his mouth crashes down on mine.
I tangle my fingers in his curls at the base of his neck, pulling him closer. Deepening the kiss as if I need it like the air I breathe. And he tastes amazing, just like at the apple orchard and the restaurant. His lips are demanding and claiming. There’s nothing gentle about this.
He lifts me to the edge of the sink and steps between my legs. My dress rides up my thighs, but I don’t care. Not when his hands are grasping my waist, and his tongue’s dancing with mine. He pulls back, his eyes bouncing between mine, searching for something he must find before he’s kissing me again. His hands roam my body, and I scrape my fingernails against his scalp until he emits a low growl.
The world seems to melt away, replaced by a dreamy haze where everything slows down. A gentle dizziness sweeps over me—a sweet, intoxicating swirl of emotions. The edges of reality blur, and a soft, warm glow envelops the moment.
It feels as if I’m standing on the edge of a cannon, ready to topple over into the chasm with the slightest breeze, swaying in perfect harmony with another. Time loses meaning, and all that exists is this exhilarating connection, a dance of warmth and light and a bite of darkness that’s tantalizing that leaves my senses pleasantly dazed and my heart fluttering.
He groans—his fingers flexing against my waist where he’s returned them—and presses between my legs. His warm length is evident through his slacks.
“Lilah, the things you do to me,” he murmurs against my swollen lips, sounding like a curse falling from his lips, as if it’s my fault he locked us into the bathroom together. He presses his forehead to mine, attempting to control his breathing. “That was number one.”
I lean back, studying his face. “Number one?”
“From my wins at mini-golf. I’m collecting.” My eyeswiden, and a faint smile lifts the corners of his lips. “You didn’t think I wouldn’t, did you?”
I laugh. “I think that was enough payment for two.”
