“Why do you like it when I claim you as mine?”
“Because it makes me feel needed.”
“Tell me more,” she says, sinking onto my lap, her hands falling to my chest.
“I like knowing I can be of value to you. You’re so independent, so strong, that there are times where I feel like you might not need me.”
She twists her lips to the side. “What I heard you say is that in order to feel love from me, you need to feel like you’re needed.”
“Wonderful, Scottie. That’s great listening,” Sanders interjects.
I nod, feeling this conversation heavier in my heart than other sessions we’ve had with Sanders, because shit…I think what I just said was actually true. I like knowing I can be of value to someone, more than just a bank account. I like knowing that I can offer my humor, my touch, my mind…my soul. I like knowing that I’m helpful, that I can bring joy. That’s very much my love language.
“And do you need him?” Sanders asks.
Scottie’s eyes meet mine as she tilts her head, studying me. “Yeah, I do.”
“And how does that make you feel, Wilder?”
I wet my lips, pride surging through my chest. “Fucking amazing.”
“Good. Now, Scottie, tell him what your love language is.”
She lets out a sigh and plays with the collar of my shirt, the subtle movement of her finger near my neck causing my stomach to dance in playful knots.
Jesus, man, pull it together.
A girl sits on your lap, and all of a sudden, you have butterflies in your stomach?
Tighten up.
“Attention,” she says quietly, and from the droop in her shoulders and the lack of eye contact, I know she’s speaking from experience. She’s speaking her truth.
“What I heard you say is that you need more attention from me. Tell me more,” I say.
She draws a circle over my chest. “I want to feel like I’m the most important thing in your life. I want to come home from work to find you excited to see me. I want you to want to kiss me. Hug me. Touch me other than when it’s for sex.” Her eyes lift to mine. “I want to know that if I were to walk out that door, walk away from this relationship, that you would know it was the biggest mistake of your life.”
“Pips, I already know that. That’s why I’m here.”
“Repeat what she said,” Sanders says as he takes a seat on the arm of the couch, moving in on us.
“What I heard you say is that you want to know that you’re the most important thing in my life. You are. That you want me to want to kiss you, hug you, touch you. I fucking do, Pips.” I run my hands up and down her sides. “And if you walked out that door, ending us, I would be devastated. Tell me more.”
Her hands slide to my neck as she says, “I don’t want you to hide. I want to know everything about you. The good and the bad.”
“What I heard you say is that you want to know everything about me, the good and the bad. And I want to tell you, Pips. I really fucking do.”
My mouth goes dry as those words hit me harder than I expected, because fuck, I’ve been shouldering so much ever since my father passed away. I’ve been holding my mom’s secrets close to my chest. I’ve been taking care of Mika, making sure he stays mentally healthy. I’ve been making sure that as a family unit, we don’t fall apart. And…and it’s tiring.
“Great,” Sanders says, bouncing the ball and startling the both of us out of the trance we were just in. “This was exceptional. Wilder, you want to be needed. Scottie, you want to feel special. Have you told each other this before?”
I shake my head. “No, we haven’t told each other that.”
“Then this is what we call a minor breakthrough.” He tosses the ball across the room and then moves back over to his chair. “The key to a successful, championship-winning team is understanding each other. Understanding what you can offer and understanding what you need the most. We explored that today. Now, I want you to take what you spoke about and go see Ellison, as she has an activity ready for you two to participate in. I expect for you to continue down this path of honesty. And before you start yelling at each other, please remember the communication we experienced today in this room. And if you need a reset, remember this position you’re in. Return to it. Speak to each other like we did. Practice. Because if we’re not practicing, we’re never going to win.”
Eh, the last part could have used some adjustments, but then again, there’s only so much you can do when it comes to comparing a marriage to a sports team.
“You can find Ellison over by the dining hall. I’ll let her know that you’re looking for her.” He shoos us. “Now get out of here.”
