Meghan, with the long ponytail and freckles dotting her nose, shakes her head. “No, this is an alcohol-free camp. Sanders only allows alcohol two nights during your stay, and tonight is not one of them.”
Should have figured since the minibar was replaced with condoms and lube.
Although, some of the toys they’re upcharging for, I’d suspect I’d need some alcohol to even think about using. Especially the one in the shower. The girth on that thing is terrifying.
“Sparkling water will be fine,” I say, disappointed that I can’t lean on my good friend merlot to get me through the next eight days.
“And for you?” she asks Wilder.
“Sparkling water as well. The wife and I are twinning.”
Dear God in heaven.
“We’d also like the eggplant parm.” He sniffs the air. “And is that garlic bread I smell?”
“It is,” Meghan says with a smile. “I’ll bring you out a basket in a few.”
“That would be great, thank you,” Wilder says.
“Certainly. Is there anything else I can get you?”
“We’re good,” I say.
“Wonderful.” Then she reaches into her apron pocket and pulls out a sheet of paper. “Here are your questions for tonight.”
“Questions?” I ask. “What are these for?”
“Every evening, you’ll be given a set of questions that you must ask each other. Sanders requires it. If you need anything else, just flag me down.”
“Thank you,” Wilder says while taking the questions from Meghan.
She takes off, and I lean forward, trying to take a gander at what’s on the piece of paper.
“What kind of questions are we talking about over there?” I ask. “Because if it’s ‘Will I pay fifteen dollars for a pack of three condoms,’ the answer is no.”
He shakes his head. “No, they’re regular, thought-provoking questions.”
“Really?” I ask. “Like what?”
“Well, they’re listed out by the questions I need to ask you and the questions you need to ask me.”
“Do you think we have to do them?” I ask.
Wilder looks up and glances around the food hall. “I mean, it seems like everyone is doing them. It would be odd if we didn’t.”
I look around as well and notice how deep in conversation each couple is. Hell, okay, maybe we do have to do the questions.
“Okay, do you want to go first?”
“Sure, we can go back and forth,” he answers. He studies the first question and then looks up at me. “Why are superheroes portrayed as heroes who wear their underwear outside their pants?”
“What?” I ask. “That’s the question?”
He nods. “Yup.”
Leaning more forward, I whisper, “This place is weird. Between the cabin sex-a-thons, the owner with the moose antlers, and the superhero question, like what are we really doing here? I mean, it’s weird, right?”
“It could be perceived that way,” Wilder says. “But that’s not an answer to the question.”
