“Like clockwork,” I say. “Thank you for helping me score that suite. It was perfect. After the whole kiss cam thing, we snuggled and watched the game, even though we couldn’t care less what was going on.”
“Not a problem. Glad it worked. How do you think she’s feeling right now?”
“Good,” I say. “Last night, when I was at her door, I asked her another question.”
“What was it this time?”
“Asked her what’s one thing she wished Matt did different in the bedroom?”
“Perfect. That’s the question we were considering, right? To show our progress with her?”
“Yes.”
“And what did she answer?”
“She said she wished he was more adventurous.”
Sanders nods and tosses me the ball.
Ever since I got back from Camp Haven, I’ve had weekly meetings with him. We talk about me and my relationship with Mika and my mom—he doesn’t just focus on marriages but all kinds of relationships, which I like—and of course, I’ve been heavily focused on educating myself on what Scottie experienced in her marriage. No man is perfect, so I know I won’t ever care for her perfectly. But that man made vows to Scottie. He declared that he’d do everything in his ability to love herwell, and he didn’t take those vows seriously. It just pisses me off, as not only did she learn to devalue her needs, but her self-confidence suffered terribly.
I have also learned that even though she might seem happy on the outside, she’s probably comparing every new moment I have with her to her ex. Sanders said it’s a natural thing to do, especially when it comes to someone who was in a mentally absent relationship.
Which is exactly what Scottie endured.
Sanders explained to me that being mentally absent from a marriage can dismantle a person’s confidence, because it makes it seem like they’re not important, that they have no significance. And if treated like that for sufficient time, they start adapting those qualities, which is why when I first started complimenting her, she wouldn’t accept the compliment.
It’s why I ask her a question about Matt after our dates, because I don’t want to repeat the same mistakes. I also want to ensure she feels significant. Valued. Listened to.Happy.
“More adventurous. Do you think you can make that happen?”
I catch the football and give him a look, making him laugh. “What do you think, Sanders? My damn dick is pierced.”
He lets out a roar of a laugh. “Adventurous it is. So is that what you’re going to do next as one of the big dates?”
“I think so,” I say, thinking back to all the little things we’ve been doing during the week.
Dinners, walks in the park, riding the ferry just to fucking ride it and spend time together. There are moments that I’ve been capturing with her the last few weeks, and when we’re not together, we’re constantly texting or talking on the phone. But the big dates, or the dates that are centered around the bucket list that we wrote out at Camp Haven, those are the ones that I’ve been planning and putting effort into.
“You ready to get intimate with her?”
“We’ve already been intimate, Sanders.”
“Well aware,” he says. “We heard it at the camp.”
That makes me smile.
“And I saw you two in the lake.”
I chuckle. “That was hot.”
“I’m surprised that water didn’t make everything shrivel up.”
“You know, I’m just that attracted to her that no cold water could make my dick disappear.”
“Aww. To be young again.”
I toss the football to him and answer his question. “But yes, I am ready to be intimate. I think it’s time. We’ve been doing this for about three, four weeks now, and every time I answer no to her request to go into her apartment, I can see her get sadder and sadder. I think it’s time.”
