My heart hammers in my chest as I realize that, yes, it’s a posting for her job.
“What the fuck . . .” I whisper.
“She didn’t say anything to you?” Hornsby asks.
“Does it look like she said something to me?” I ask as I set his phone down and lean my head back, my mind swirling with every thought conceivable.
How long has she known?
Did she know at the wedding?
Is she only fucking me, knowing that she’s leaving?
Is that why she’s grown detached? Why she leaves every morning before we can actually talk? Because she’s fucking leaving for a new job?
“Dude, are you okay?” Pacey asks.
“No,” I shout. “I’m not fucking okay.” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “She took another job and didn’t tell me. Is she moving? Is that why . . .” I clench my jaw. “Is that why she’s been so emotionally distant?”
“She’s still avoiding you in the morning?” Hornsby asks.
“Yes, and I did what you told me to do. I kept fucking her. What I thought was good advice. Now, I’m fucking a girl who’s probably leaving. No wonder she’s not talking—she doesn’t want to grow attached. I’m dispensable to her.”
“You don’t know that,” Pacey says softly.
“Then explain to me what’s going on.”
The boys all exchange glances, silence falling among us.
“That’s what I thought,” I say as I stand. “Fuck . . . this.”
I walk to the back of the plane where I can be alone.
BLAKELY
“Wait,have we really drank a bottle and a half of wine?” I ask Penny as I reach for the bottle to refill our glasses.
She scans my apartment, taking in the empty to-go boxes from The Garbanzo Bean, the one empty bottle, and the child-free space, thanks to Penny’s parents who are watching Holden.
“I think we did.” She wiggles her glass at me. “Fill ’er up.”
I chuckle and finish off the bottle, filling our glasses for us both.
“So is there a reason you lured me into your sex-pad with wine and good food?” Penny asks.
“Can’t a girl just hang out with her friend?”
“She can,” Penny replies. “But you also have this look on your face like you need to tell me something. Are you in love with Halsey? Because I approve.”
I shake my head. “No.”
“Shame.” She sighs heavily. “He’s perfect for you.”
“I don’t want to talk about Halsey right now.”
“Well, that seems loaded, but I’ll put that on hold. What did you want to talk to me about?”
Here goes nothing.
