* * *
I finish unpackingmy clothes and setting my puzzles on the dresser—because those are important—just as my phone dings with a message. I check the screen to see my brother’s name.
He’s been informed of my presence.
Ryland:Not going to tell me you’re in town? I have to hear it through the grapevine?
I sit on the bed and text him back.
Hattie:I was going to make my way over there. Had to find a place to live first.
Ryland:Live? Why aren’t you in school?
Hattie:Surprised that wasn’t relayed to you. Professors thought taking a break after Cassidy’s death would be good. Working an internship up here. Aubree said I could stay in the bedroom above the shop.
Ryland:You’re taking a break? Is the internship at least for credits?
God, I hate this, having to answer to my brother, who stood up for us when we were little, who took Dad’s spot when Dad wouldn’t bother parenting. The one who I’ve looked up to my whole life. And my answer is going to be a lie. But how could I possibly tell him that I failed this semester? He would be so disappointed in me, and right now, a lie outweighs the disappointment I know I’d face if I told him the truth.
I’m just hoping this job with Hayes will get me through the rest of the semester, and then I can figure out what to do during the summer. Maybe I could take a job with Ethel, making beds and cleaning rooms. Or I can help Dee Dee Coleman stock the shelves at her grocery store.
Or perhaps . . . Aubree will let me help her.
Hattie:Yes, this internship is for credit.
Ryland:At least there’s that. Wish you were still in school, though.
Hattie:I know, but this is a great opportunity.
Yeah, a great opportunity with your enemy, sorting through boxes and organizing said enemy. Maybe I can stick it on my résumé as something fancy like . . . executive business associate. Some crap like that. I should have worked a title into the deal with him.
Ryland:Well, Mac knows you’re here. She wants to see you.
Hattie:Let’s plan for tomorrow. I’m exhausted.
Ryland:Okay.
I stare at my phone, the worry of my siblings floating through my mind. I feel so out of touch with them, like an outsider trying to weasel my way back in.
Hattie:Hey, is everything okay with Aubree? She seemed short with me.
Ryland:She’s fine. Nothing you need to worry about.
His answer frustrates me. I’m not blind. I can see she’s not in a good headspace, and she’s stressed. Why isn’t she saying anything to me? Why are they both passing it off as if everything is just fine?
Hattie:Let me guess, I just need to worry about school.
Ryland:Exactly. See you tomorrow, kid.
I shake my head and toss my phone to the side before leaning back on the bed. School, that’s all they care about. I had a short time back home after Cassidy passed before they rushed me back to school, telling me it would be best to get back into my routine.
But the last thing I wanted was to get back into a routine. I wanted to be with them. I wanted to be with Mac. I wanted to feel Cassidy surround me.
I didn’t get that. Instead, I was greeted with a cold apartment with no family to help me through the pain. They pushed me away then, just like they’re pushing me away now, and I have no idea why.
What am I supposed to do, Cassidy?
Why did you leave us?
