A Month and a Half Post Intended Wedding Day
“You look well,”Lara says as she walks next to me, down the long hallway of the palace.
I left my room for the first time a week ago and it was an ordeal. Like Theo said, he walked next to me while palace staff clutched at their chests, wishing me well. I cried several times, feeling so warm inside from the people here supporting me. Who are rooting for me. I didn’t realize how upset people have been while I’ve mourned.
I can understand the relief. Their future queen had her heart destroyed, and she’s been isolated in her room with some major health scares, so to see me out and about must give them hope.
Walking in my slippers and a set of green-and-blue-plaid flannel pajamas, I take it slow, still building up my stamina.
“Are you just saying that, or do you mean it?”
“I mean it,” Lara says.
“Well, I would like to say the same about you, but it looks like you’ve been run over by a truck.”
She pushes a stray hair behind her ear and says, “Some sleepless nights is all.”
“Want to talk about it?”
She shakes her head. “I want to focus on you.”
“I thought you would say that,” I respond as I stop and take a deep breath. Lara waits patiently for me. “Runa told me that you and Ottar haven’t been on speaking terms.”
“We speak,” Lara says.
“About anything other than the job?” I ask her.
“I’d rather not get into it.”
I turn toward her and say, “Lara, what are you doing? You two were so great together.”
“That doesn’t matter,” she says, looking down at the ground.
I start walking again, and she falls in line with my slow pace. “Does this have anything to do with Keller’s disappearance?”
“No,” she answers.
“Why don’t I believe you?”
She sighs heavily and pauses, then she turns toward me. “Lilly, if you don’t want me to talk about Keller, then please respect me when I say we’re not talking about Ottar. We’re keeping it professional, so let’s leave it at that.”
Sensing her need for this conversation to be over, I agree, and we start walking again, the afternoon sun draping through the stained-glass windows of the long hallway.
“Have there been any new developments about Keller?” I ask, surprised I can say his name out loud twice in one day, let alone five minutes.
From the corner of my eyes, I catch Lara shaking her head. “No. We heard rumblings that he’s joined a team of fishermen on the south coast, but nothing concrete.”
I slowly nod, letting that sink in.
On a boat, fishing.
That’s what he’d rather do than be the man I need. And it’s not like the requirements for the man I need are too big, too demanding. All he has to do is love me and stay by my side, that’s it. That’s all I’ve ever asked from him, yet he makes it seem like any other job, any other path in life is superior to the purgatory he’d experience with me.
“Well.” I clear my throat. “I hope he catches some big fish and enjoys his time out on the open sea.”
“Lilly—”
I hold my hand up. “It’s fine. Let’s move on.”
