“Well, I’m glad to hear it,” I say with a big smile that is as fake as fake can be.
“Okay, have fun. I’m going to meet up with Breaker right now.” She twiddles her fingers at me as my heart sinks down to the floor.
“Yeah, bye,” I say as I turn toward the line, my breath picking up. He’s meeting up with her right now?
I know I told him not to bother showing up for the dress shopping, but he really isn’t going to be there?
No one is going to be there besides The Beave.
Is that what my life has come to? I don’t have any other friends?
I don’t have any other support?
All I have is Brian and his mother?
Once again, tears well in my eyes, but I don’t let them fall, not here, not in the coffee shop. I make quick work of ordering myself a coffee, and thankfully, they’re quick to deliver. With coffee in hand, I decide to walk to the bridal shop, which is a few blocks down. No need to drive.
As I head down the street, I clutch my coffee close to my chest and let out a deep breath.
Mom was supposed to be here today, and she’s not.
I’ve isolated myself so much after their deaths that I’ve slowly lost any other friendships I had besides Breaker because he was the one who held me when I cried. He distracted me when I was feeling sad. He kept me moving forward.
And now that we’re not talking and in a weird place, I’ve never felt more alone in my entire life.
When I reach the bridal shop, I hold my breath, waiting to see any sign of Breaker, but as I draw closer, all I can see through the windows is The Beave, pulling dresses for me to try on.
For a moment, the thought of running away crosses my mind. Taking off and just . . . leaving. Fleeing, getting away from all of this, but as the thought comes, it quickly washes away because that will do nothing to solve the problem. It will only trigger it more.
So with a cup of coffee in hand, a fake smile on my face, I walk through the doors of the bridal shop.
“Ah, there she is,” The Beave says when she spots me. “My dear, look at your hair.” Here come the insults. “It’s so lovely.” She walks up to me and strokes the long strands. “I would prefer you have an updo for the wedding, but this is quite appealing.”
Color me shocked. Was not expecting that, and even though it was nice to avoid any snark, scowl, or insult from my future mother-in-law, it does nothing to curb my morose mood.
“Thank you,” I say and then glance around the empty bridal shop. “Are we the only ones here?”
“Oh, I blocked off the shop for us so we won’t be disturbed by any other people searching for a dress. I thought having the shop to ourselves could ensure we stay focused on what we’re looking for.”
We . . . funny how she uses that term aboutmydress.
“We do have at least three to find,” she adds.
Oh, I forgot about that.
“Yes, a lot of shopping to do,” I say as I look around one more time, just in case Breaker is here and I missed him.
“Now, where is Breaker so we can get started?” she asks.
Well, that confirms it. He’s not here. Another dose of anxiety and depression rips through me.
“Oh, uh, something came up,” I say. “He won’t be able to make it.”
The lie feels so lifeless coming out of me, I barely believe it myself, but it seems to appease The Beave because she snaps her stupid fingers and says, “Well then, let’s get started. We’ll be trying on ceremony dresses first. I had them pull classic silhouettes as well as elegant off-the-shoulder pieces.”
“Great,” I say, going with the motions.
“Right this way, Miss Fairweather-Fern,” one of the shop assistants says.
