After she ate a few more bites of her food, we packed everything up in containers and stuck it in the fridge. Since she wasn’t in the mood for a board game, we both took a seat on the couch, where we’ve been mindlessly watching reruns ever since. I’ve wanted to pull her in close several times, to stretch her legs across mine, to massage her feet, to do anything to touch her, and to make her feel better.
“Don’t apologize,” I say.
“I know, but I didn’t even ask you how your date with Birdy was. I just kind of bogarted the night with my issues.”
“You didn’t bogart anything. You have the right to be upset. Brian let you down, and you need to work through those feelings. There’s nothing to apologize for.”
“Still . . .” She turns toward me now. “How was birdwatching with Birdy?”
I shrug casually, keeping my eyes on the TV as I say, “We decided just to be friends.”
“What?” she asks. “Why?”
I shrug again. “Just don’t think I was into it like she was.”
“And she was okay with that? She said she was so excited about meeting you.”
“She was,” I answer. “We had a real honest conversation about it, actually. She could tell I wasn’t feeling it and said it was okay. She’d rather know now than have me drag things on. We still went on a hike together. Did some talking, and I told her I would hook her up with one of my friends who I think would be perfect for her.”
“Who?” she asks as her lips lightly turn up.
“Penn.”
Momentarily forgetting her woes, Lia leans over and grips my forearm. “Oh my God, Breaker, they would make the cutest couple.”
“I think so, plus Penn is really honest, and is the kind of guy she’s looking for.”
“Is he dating?”
“I think so, just hasn’t found anyone he wants to be serious about. I think that could be Birdy.”
“Well, look at you being a matchmaker. I’m sorry it didn’t work out, though, I thought you were looking for that kind of relationship,” she says.
“I was, but she wasn’t what I wanted.”
“What do you want?” she asks.
You.
Everything about you.
Your soul.
Your mind.
Your heart.
Your body.
I want all of you, every last fucking inch of you.
“Still processing that. I’ll let you know when I’m ready.”
“Oh, you have an idea?”
“Yes, I have an exact idea, but it’s going to take some finagling, so let’s put this conversation on pause.”
“Okay, that’s not evasive at all.”
