“Either way, you shouldn’t have been pulling on my shorts, unless... that was your plan all along. Trying to get me naked to sit on your face.” I lean back and slowly clap. “Wow, Kelsey, job well done.”
Her head whips toward me and her nostrils flare. Ahh, there they are. I missed them. “You know damn well my intention wasn’t to get you naked to sit on my face. I couldn’t imagine a more grotesque situation.”
“Didn’t seem to mind it last night,” I say, going back to my phone. She swats it out of my hand again. “Hey, stop doing that.”
“I did not enjoy your balls on my face. I specifically remember screaming and telling you to get off me.”
“Yeah, as you held me down.”
She turns back to the driver, who has remained silent this entire time. What I wouldn’t pay to be inside his head right now. “I did not hold him down. I was flustered and didn’t know what was happening. When I realized what was on my face, I got up immediately. I just want you to know I’m not the kind of girl who enjoys balls on her face.”
“Such a shame,” I say.
She growls out a frustrated noise and folds her arms over her chest as she sits back in her seat. “Why do I even bother talking to you? You’re so infuriating.”
“Beats me. You’re the one who didn’t want the silent treatment, so this is your choice.” I locate my phone and, when she goes to swat it again, I hold it close to my chest. “Nice try.”
Just then, her phone rings in her purse and she quickly brings it into view. She glances at me. “It’s Huxley.”
“Put it on speaker.”
Looking at me with murder weapons as eyes, she says, “I swear to God, JP, if you bring up the balls on the face thing with him, I’ll legit haunt you in your sleep. Do you understand me?”
“Sure,” I say, even though I wouldn’t say anything to the boys. I didn’t tell them last night what happened, didn’t think it was appropriate.
Putting on a smile—as if he can see her—she answers the phone, “Good morning, Huxley.”
Wow, what a transformation, from a she-devil to Delightful Diane. Who knew she was capable of such a metamorphosis?
“Good morning, Kelsey.”
“I have you on speakerphone so JP can hear you. We’re on our way to the meeting right now.”
“I take it you two have settled in since the activities of last night?”
“Oh my God, JP,” she says, looking at me. “You told your brother that your penis landed on my face?”
Oh, Kelsey...
He was not talking aboutthat.
I can’t hold back my smile. I held it together withJunior Pooper, but this, nope, I have to smile, because she just gave herself away.
“What?” Huxley growls.
Kelsey’s eyes widen as her cheeks flush to a gorgeous shade of pink.
“I didn’t tell him anything.” I smirk. “But you just did.”
“Oh, dear God,” she whispers.
“What’s going on? JP, if you fuck with her, I’m going to—”
“No, nothing happened,” Kelsey quickly says. “It was just a, uh, scramble, and then we tripped on each other, and I really mean that, not like, ‘Oops I tripped and fell on his penis, my bad.’ I swear, this was just an unfortunate incident and it was quickly rectified with screaming, yelling, and swatting. There’s no funny business between us.”
“She’s correct,” I say. “Nothing is going on, and trust me, nothing will be going on. You don’t have to worry about that.”
“Good. Kelsey, you tell me if he does try to make a move.”
