“Is there anything I can help you look for?” he asks as he walks side by side with me.
“Uh, not really. Just searching for a journal sort of thing.”
“What kind of journal?”
“One where I can write down my feelings and such as I move through the pregnancy. My mom kept one when she was pregnant with both me and Pacey. She just used a notebook, though. I know there are some out on the market that guide you. So, you know, just looking for that.”
“That’s pretty cool. Do you have yours from when your mom was pregnant with you?”
“Yes, I do. She gave it to me when I graduated high school. I really enjoyed looking through it, so I thought it might be nice to have one for our kid.”
“That is nice.” He’s silent for a second. “Have you told your parents yet?”
I shake my head as we round the corner to the pregnancy section. “I honestly have no idea how to break the news to them. I don’t know what they’re going to say. I’m pretty sure my dad just assumed I’ve never had sex and wants to keep it that way in his mind.”
“Do you want to tell them together? That way, you have someone to fall back on in case it doesn’t go well?”
“I know it won’t go well. I love my parents, but I don’t think they expected to be grandparents without a wedding beforehand. And they’re pretty chill about a lot of things, but I think this might be a hard one for them to accept.”
“Either way, I’ll be there for you. Like we said from the very beginning, this pregnancy isn’t for you to shoulder alone. We’re in this together. Just let me know when you want to tell them, and I’ll be there.”
“That means a lot to me, thank you.”
“Of course.” He glances at the stack of books and pulls one off the shelf. “The Big Fat Activity Book for Pregnant People.” This seems like fun. He flips it open and starts laughing. “Oh, this is good. Look, you can draw pictures of the people who annoy you while you’re pregnant.”
“Isn’t that charming?”
“Ooo, and it has quizzes.”
“Uh, that doesn’t really seem like what I’m looking for.”
“Well, I’m sold,” he says while leaning against the shelf and flipping through it.
“Sold as in you’re getting it for yourself?”
“Yeah.”
“But you’re not pregnant.”
“I’m not?” he asks, staring down at his stomach. “Are you sure?”
I pat his stomach, his rock-hard stomach, and swallow hard. Wow, that’s a lot harder than I remember. Not that he was flabby by any means on his birthday, but that’s quite the flat stomach he has. “Uh, no . . . no baby in there.”
“Odd, I thought I was pregnant.”
“Stop it.” I poke him this time, which makes him laugh. “You don’t need that pregnancy book.”
“Uh, hell yeah, I do. I might not be carrying the child, but I’m still experiencing things. Plus, it will be entertaining. Something to do when I’m in my hotel room by myself. Or when I’m waiting for you to be done in the bathroom. Which, by the way, you take a long time. If we were at my place, we would have our own bathrooms, and that wouldn’t be a problem.”
“I would not be comfortable in your place.”
His brow scrunches together. “Why not?”
“It’s big.”
“It’s a two-bedroom. I wouldn’t call that big. You should see some of the places the other guys have. My apartment is incredibly modest.”
“And the fireplace would just taunt me, chanting over and over this is where you had sex, this is where you got pregnant.”
