“Help you what? Understand a woman? Why do I need to be your educator? Read a book.”
Now he rears back slightly, blinking. “Hey, Penny, what the hell is going on? Did I do something wrong?”
“Oh, you finally realize you did something wrong? Wow, Eli, it only took you seven freaking months.”
“Wait . . . what are you talking about?”
Chalk it up to the hormones, possibly my defense mechanism to how destroyed I feel inside, but I can’t seem to control my emotions.
I love him.
But I hate him.
I hate him so much for putting me through this. For being so caring, attentive, and appreciative, but that’s it. There’s nothing else, and that is what’s making me sad.
That is what’s making me cry whenever he leaves.
That is what’s fueling the fire to the raging flames burning through me.
“If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then I can’t help you.”
He pauses, blinking a few times, and it’s almost comical, watching him try to process all of this. Isn’t it clear as day why I’m irritated? How come no one can understand besides me?
“I’m sorry, Penny, but I really don’t understand.”
“Typical,” I say while I tug on my bra that, despite being five years old, still has the elasticity of a brand new one, causing my boobs to feel so confined that I can’t even take it, so I tear it off over my head and drop it to the side. Leaving me in nothing but a pair of underwear.
I watch as Eli’s eyes drift to my chest and then quickly back up.
“Was it the bra? Do I need to get you a shirt or something?”
“Uh, are you saying I need to cover up?”
“No,” he says, his tone deepening. “I’m just trying to make you comfortable.”
“Well, me comfortable, is sitting here in nothing but my underwear. What do you think about that?”
He smooths his hand over his jaw. “Honestly, I think it’s hot. Your tits are fucking sexy.”
There he goes again.
“Ugh.” I toss my hands up. “What am I? A piece of meat now?”
“Jesus Christ, did I say that?” The timid voice he was using has now turned to irritated.
Join the club.
“Might as well have. Am I just a vessel for your sexual needs, Eli?”
“Yeah, Penny,” he says sarcastically. “You’re just a hole to stick my dick in.”
I point my finger at him. “I knew it.”
“Jesus . . . fuck, you’re losing it.”
“Excuse me?”
“Yeah, you heard me. You’re fucking losing it. And I’d say I’ve been pretty fucking good the past two weeks since you moved in. I’ve been at your beck and call, given you everything you want, even fucking you whenever you hopped on my lap—”
