"Um..." I was trying so hard to concentrate on Kehlani's hair, but at the same time, my mind was twisted over what James was telling me. This was so out of left field, I didn't even know what to say. I was happy and grateful, and a little surprised. Okay, alotsurprised.
"I–I guess that would be okay."
With my mind still in a haze, I gave him brief instructions on what to do when he arrived—how to sign in, the gate code and alarm code in case he arrived first. "Clean up is at midday, and you can leave straight after. Don't forget to sign out with the same code. I'll message the parents to let them know you're coming. They're all very friendly and will help you out."
I swiftly packed both bags with their lunches before kissing the girls—andmy husband—and waving them off.
***
James
What was going through my wife's mind? It was a thought that ruminated with me on most days.
Okay, every day.
Sometimes Zara would look at me with an odd expression, as if I were a new organism she was studying under a microscope. We still hadn't made love, and this was definitely the longest time I had gone without touching my wife intimately. I was desperate and so horny for her that even the sight of her bare ankles had my cock punching through my briefs.
Was she still planning on leaving me? What if she'd fallen out of love and nothing I did or said would make a difference? It didn't matter to me if I was wasting my time—not until Zara said it was over. Not until I had exhausted all avenues to save our marriage. I'd never stop trying to prove to her that I finally sawher. Not just as a mum and wife, but as a partner; as my equal. As someone I loved and appreciated.
April twenty-seventh came around too fast for my liking, and before I knew it, Bronwyn arrived home from her jaunt abroad with a bag full of gifts for the girls.
My face burned with shame when I greeted her, recalling everything my wife had confided in her with—all my sins and shortfalls and the ways I mirrored her ex-husband.
I'd always gotten along well with Bronwyn. For someone who jetsetted at least twice a year, Bronwyn was super involved with Zara and our girls' lives. She was warm and funny, and we always had a great laugh together.
"Hi James, how are you?"
"Fine, Bron. You're looking well." I bent to hug her and tried to gauge whether her embrace felt different. What must she think of me?
"I'm making fish and chips for dinner tonight. Hope you're hungry."
"Starved." Her smile looked normal, and there was nothing frayed or stilted about the way she was looking at me. But then again, Bronwyn was the type of person who showed everyone love and kindness.
I made dinner while my wife sat on the couch, a soft smile on her face as she watched her mum play with her grandkids. Now and then, I'd refill Bronwyn's wine or check whether they needed anything. All the while, Zara would glance at me with that same odd expression, like she was seeing me for the first time—and she wasn't sure she liked what she saw.
"Wow, this all looks so good, James. Thank you."
I smiled my thanks at my mother-in-law before subtly glancing at Zara. Was she impressed with what I made? I felt like a school kid trying to show off in front of my crush.
My fears were heightened later on when I urged Bron and Zara to relax in the living room while I cleaned up the dishes. Their loud chatter and laughter had started to quieten down, and a wave of panicked suspicion knocked against my heart.
Whenever I glanced up, I spied Bronwyn and Zara whispering away in the corner. Now and then, Bronwyn would flick her eyes towards me before giving me a soft, almost guilty, smile.
That foreboding in my chest deepened. Christ, what if it really was too late?
Chapter 12
Zara
Igrabbed my bag and found James in the kitchen helping Sienna colour. It was another heavy rain day today, so James was off work while Kehlani was at school. "Is it okay if I head over to Mum's for a bit?"
My husband glanced up, his eyes sinking to my bag and keys before he placed a kiss on Sienna's head and stood. He crossed over to me, his face looking a little pale. Was he coming down with something?
"Is everything okay?"
I evaded his stare and shrugged. "Yeah. I just have some stuff I need to talk to her about."
His nostrils flared, and his throat bobbed. Licking his lips, he hoarsely asked, "Do you want me and Sienna to come with you?"
