“Child’s play!”
37
NOT LIKE THIS
But it wasn’t child’s play two weeks later as she stood in her bathroom and stared at the positive pregnancy test.
She closed her eyes, inhaled as much oxygen as she could, let it out, then opened them hoping for different results.
Nope!
Her hand was shaking as she clutched the results of losing her heart to a man who never stayed in one place longer than a year.
A tidal wave of anger, frustration, and soul-crushing disappointment surged through her, raw and uncontrollable. Things she’d held in most of her life and just couldn’t another minute.
A scream tore from her throat as she hurled the test across the room, the plastic shattering against the wall like the illusion of control she’d been clinging to since Arik walked back into her life.
Her hands cupped her mouth, stunned silent by her response.
She’d never done anything like that.
Ever.
But she’d never been in love before. Nor felt such fear of letting the person know.
There was no hiding this.
She bent to pick up the pieces of the broken test in the hallway, brought them back to the bathroom to place on the counter and sank onto the lid of the toilet, her face in her hands and her sobbing all but wrecking her body.
How stupid she’d been. How could she not see the signs?
Because she’d never been pregnant before.
Never had a reason to worry about it.
They were protecting themselves. Each and every single time!
Did they get a little aggressive or out of control once in a while? Sure. Who didn’t?
Could that have caused this to happen?
Sitting here and analyzing something she couldn’t change wasn’t helping her.
She took a large breath in, slapped her hands to her knees and pushed herself up. Her glance in the mirror was horrifying.
Her face was a blotchy red mess, wet, and shiny clear snot dripping out of her nose, her eyes a faucet with broken handles running on steroids.
Babies were a wonderful thing, she silently chanted.
She loved kids.
She’d always wanted them.
Just not like this.
She turned the water on cold, ran her hands under it, cupped as much as she could and splashed it over her face. Arik would be here soon. Maybe she should have waited to take the test until tomorrow morning before work.
Yeah, that wouldn’t have been any better if she had to walk into the building looking as if her world was ending.
