For me?My one true mate? His mind reeled dizzily. He knew it wasn’t true; but then why did those words seem to stop his heart for a moment?
Maggie’s hand flew to her mouth, as if she had suddenly remembered something. “Oh God, the bairn! Where is she Ceann? Tell me!Which way did she go? You did send her off with guards, didn’t you? You wouldn’t leave her to be set upon by thieves. If anything happens to the bairn I swear I’ll never forgive you! That child is innocent in all of this.”
Ceann felt his stomach suddenly fall to the floor, while at the same time his heart thudded slowly and loudly in his ears. It was hard to draw a breath to speak.
“What bairn?” he asked in a weak voice, not daring to hope.
“Yours, you foolish, insensible man!The curse is broken at last. She carriesyourbairn, and now you’ve sent her away to God knows wherewhen you should be protecting her and your child with your very life!”She paused, and drew in a deep breath in an effort to calm herself enough to continue. “Did she not tell you herself? I sent her to find you as soon as I had confirmed it. She was in such a state when she found out.” She twisted and wrung her hands.“Said you wouldn’t wed her, said you’d told her you couldn’t ever get a woman with bairn…”
“I can’t!”Ceann groaned as he sat down heavily on the bed. His head swirled and he felt sick deep inside. “I didn’t think I could, Maggie… I… oh God, what have I done!”She came here for me? What was he supposed to think? What could he believe?He looked up at her with such anguish in his eyes that Maggie took pity on him and came to put her hand on his arm.
His thoughts were swimming, but through it all, hope...“Are you sure? Are you absolutely sure?”
“Of course I’m sure”, she replied indignantly, “I examined her myself, and I’ve seen more bairns into this world than…”
“But how is it possible?” he said as if to himself.
With a gusty sigh Maggie put her hands on her hips and eyed him speculatively. “I think you know exactly how it’s ‘possible’ young man, and if I weren’t so worried about Ella right now, I’d beat you senseless for what you’ve done to her. Devil take you! What could you be thinking? And she an innocent lass! I asked her did you offer her marriage after you took her and she told me no, you didn’t!Why your own good mother, were she here, would take a strap to your hide and say she raised you better. And your father, why he would have…”
Ceann stood abruptly, cutting off Maggie’s moral tirade.“I’m going after her; I made a mistake… I have to find her.” He took a deep breath, and his whole body trembled.“I didn’t send guards, Maggie; I don’t even know where she went! Oh God.” Damn it, he’d been a fool, acting on his hurt and pain, not even giving her a chance to explain.She’s mine.And in his heart he knew now that it was true.He had known all along, but had chosen to stubbornly deny the truth. He could only hope it wasn’t too late. A child.Mychild.Unshed tears burned the backs of his eyes.God, Ella I’m so sorry…
Iona turned from the window, her eyes still distant, narrowed, seeing things that Ella could not. “He searches for you, lass.”
Ella, seated by the fire, crossed her arms and tilted her chin. “Let him”, she said, “I don’t want to see that man, I don’t think I’m ready to forgive him yet.” She had been staying with Iona in her small cottage for nearly three weeks now, but the pain in her heart hadn’t lessened. She was grateful to the other woman for taking her in when she had appeared on her doorstep with Ethan, exhausted and tear-stained, with nowhere else to go. Grateful for the sympathetic ear as she told her story, well the parts of it she could… and Iona didn’t ask for the rest.Ella had the feeling she knew anyway. Iona could See almost as well as Malcolm.
Iona sat down beside her, picking up her hand and patting it gently, like a mother would.
“Ella love, I can’t tell you what you should do, but you should know that Ceann is a good man. He will see his mistakes, and he will make amends. He wronged you, yes, but he acted on his own deep hurt, and the fear that nothing so perfect could ever be his. He cares for you more than you know, but he’s been too afraid to let those feelings grow.” She paused, gently wiping away the single tear that was rolling down Ella’s cheek. “Lass, don’t you think he has a right to know he is to be a father?”
Ella gasped in astonishment. “How did you know about… oh, never mind.” Iona had the Sight, of course she would know.What else did she see?She set her jaw. “I tried to tell that bad-tempered, unreasonable man that he got me with child, even after he swore he couldn’t! He wouldn’t listen, and he most likely wouldn’t have believed me anyway. He still thinks I’m a spy”, she added irritably.
Iona smiled gently at her, and stood, releasing her hand. The sudden absence of her touch made Ella realize how warm it had been, and comforting. Like Esme’s touch when she had been a little girl. But now she was a grown woman, and soon to be a mother. She would have to sort things out for herself, as best she could. Standing, Iona went to the door and opened it, turning to look back at Ella, her eyes held an almostpleading look. “The bairn is a true blessing, Ella.And as you are his very heart, please give my son another chance to make things right.”
She closed the door behind her as she went out, leaving Ella alone with her parting words.Before they had even sunk in, the door opened again. It was Ethan.
He looked at her as she sat with her mouth gaping open in stunned silence.“Ah she told you. Subtle, isn’t she?”
It was another moment before Ella could speak again. “Iona is Ceann’s mother? Ethan, I had no idea… how could that be? He said his mother had died years ago.”
He smiled at her bewildered look.“Aye, Iona is his birth mother. But he doesn’t know it, not yet anyway. I only found out not long ago myself that we are half brothers. It certainly explains all of the bickering we did as boys.”
“And how close you are as men,” she said with a soft smile.“But Ethan, how… I mean… what…”
Ethan took a chair across from her and leaned back, stretching out his long legs and putting his feet up on a stool. In the past few weeks he had been a great comfort to her, caring for her as a brother would.Now she understood; he did it out of love for his own brother. “It seems that Ceann’s mother, Aisleen, who raised him, couldn’t have a child of her own. Her husband Artair loved her more than anything, and hated to see her pine away for a bairn to hold. Though I don’t know all of the particulars, eventually Iona helped them.Artair… lay with her and she gave them a child to love. In return, she was always welcome to live on their lands and watch that child grow into a man. She would never want for food or shelter, or freedom.”
Ella could not imagine the sacrifice it would have taken for Iona to hand over her child for another couple to raise. She doubted very much she could have done the same. “And what of you, Ethan?”
“Ah, well, a year or so later, Iona married, and I came along. My da died in battle when I was quite young, so I never really knew him. But Ceann’s father Artair was as much a father to me as any could be. He fostered me at the castle, when I was old enough, and trained me alongside Ceann.” Ethan paused, thoughtful, then said slowly, “Hewould have known, of course, that we were brothers. He would have wanted us to grow up together. He was a good man.” He smiled to himself, apparently lost in some distant memory from his childhood.
Ella was silent for a moment, her head whirling with all of these unforeseen revelations.Ceann had a mother he didn’t know about, and a half brother, and the curse he had feared for most of his life had apparently been broken.By me.And now he would be a father. She felt the happiness for him welling up in her before she remembered she was still mad at him, and still terribly hurt. Aye, she would forgive him, eventually, should he come to his senses and ask it of her. She knew his words and actions that night in the stable were born of his own grief and mistrust of a world he felt had wronged him, but that didn’t erase her own pain. Still, she loved him too much not to forgive him. Her heart skipped a beat.I love him.I love him with every bone in my body.
Ethan leaned forward and took her hand. “My brother loves you, you know”, he said as if he had read her thoughts.”
Ella bit her lip. “Well, he lusts for me anyway, as we all know”.
“No, he loves you. I’ve seen him lusting many a time, and then I’ve seen the way he looks at you. Even as he tries to hide it, it’s not the same. He loves you. If he has any fault, it’s that he feels too much, falls too hard. He has always had more passion that most. Maybe too much, sometimes. I think he feels things more deeply than any of us can guess.”
“I know he does, I’ve seen it. I only hope he decides it’s worth the risk to his heart, to be with me… and our child.” God it felt so strange to say that.Our child.
