Harper was sitting on a bench several yards away from the patio. She sat still and watched as Theo approached, as if she had known he would be coming. She didn’t get to her feet or make any move to greet him. She simply sat there, waiting for him to join her.
It took a surprising amount of courage for Theo to keep walking toward her. Even though he wanted to have this conversation, there was a part of him that still wanted to turn and run away. There was no telling what she would say. What if she was angry with him? After all, the communication between the two of them had never been great. There were other things thathadbeen great, but talking had always been a bit of a struggle.
Then again, there was that one night. That night they had dropped their guard and spoken to one another as friends. As more than friends. The night the baby she now carried had been conceived. Theo wondered if that night would always seem special and magical to him. He couldn’t deny that something had changed between the two of them when they had found themselves stranded here at this very venue.
“Can I sit down?” He moved toward the bench and gestured to the spot next to her.
She shrugged, but she moved to the right a little bit to make a space for him.
Theo sat down. “Are you all right?”
“I just came out here to get some air. I’m fine.”
“I meant because of what happened before. I could tell how shocked you were when Tara said what she did. I’m sorry that happened.”
Harper looked at him. “You could tellIwas shocked?You’rethe one who stormed out of the room.”
“I didn’t storm out. I just walked out.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to split hairs about this. You and I need to have a conversation.”
Her whole body seemed to deflate. “You don’t have to tell me,” she said.
“I don’t?”
“You made it pretty obvious. I mean, what Tara said… it’s true. I think you guessed that. And I think you guessed that you’re the father.”
“I did.”
“I can see how you feel about that,” she said. “You don’t have to explain it to me.”
“I’m not trying to explain it to you. I’m not here to tell you that I’m upset with you, Harper. You didn’t plan this any more than I did.”
“But I’m happy about it.” She turned to face him, and he saw that she had tears in her eyes. “That’s what you have to understand, Theo. It took me some time to settle into the way I felt, but I’m happy. And what I don’t want is for you to see it as some sort of problem that needs to be overcome. If that’s how you feel about it, then I think you and I should go our separate ways right now.”
“That isn’t how I feel,” Theo said quietly.
“Of course it is. You don’t want any of these things, Theo. I’ve always wanted a committed relationship. I’ve always wanted to be a mother. This is unpredictable and frightening, but this is what I’ve wanted my life to look like. But for you, that isn’t true. You want to be on your own. You don’t want a child.” She inhaled deeply, and he felt her tremble beside him. “You don’t want a relationship. And there’s no way for you and me to do this together without it being some kind of relationship. Even if there was nothing romantic about it, we would be committing to one another for life because we would always have a child in common. I know you don’t want that.”
“Harper…”
“No, don’t argue with me. You told me that wasn’t what you wanted. You were clear with me about it. And I don’t blame you for that. There’s nothing wrong with that choice. It just means that you and I are not compatible in terms of what’s going to happen next, and there’s no point in pretending otherwise. So, I appreciate you coming out here to have this conversation with me, Theo, but you can go. I don’t think there’s anything you’re going to say that I haven’t already guessed at.”
“You know, you don’t know me as well as you think you do.” Theo pivoted slightly on the bench so that he could face her moredirectly. “You think you have me all figured out, but you don’t, Harper.”
“I’m talking about things you told me directly. We talked about it. You said that this wasn’t something you wanted.”
“I know what I said.”
“Well, you can’t tell me that that’s changed.”
“But ithaschanged,” Theo insisted. “I don’t blame you for doubting me. I don’t blame you for being surprised. I wouldn’t have believed it either if someone had told me that my feelings were going to change like this. But they really have. And I’m sorry that I walked away from you back there. There’s no excuse for that, and I don’t expect you to forgive me.”
“You were startled. Shocked. I don’t know. Maybe I would’ve done the same thing if I’d been in your shoes.”
“The point is, I gave myself a moment to think about it. I would have thought that it would take me more than a moment. I would have thought that I would need weeks to process this information and to decide how it made me feel. But that hasn’t been the case all.”
“What do you mean?”
“The moment I really considered it, I knew that I had to be a part of this,” Theo said. “That’s partly because of the way my father treated my family. I can’t do that to you. And if I have a child, I can’t do that to my child.”
