Jo shook her head and sighed. “I don’t know what to do, Ada. I really don’t. We said we’d discuss everything and talk properly, but I can’t exactly sit there and tell her I roleplayed with Lia last night, can I? I know she’s into the club scene, and I know she’s probably filthy when she’s there, but this is different. This is me admitting that I wanted Lia to be her. It’s fucked up, is what it is.”
“Let’s not forget that this is the same woman who helped you get yourself off just last weekend on the phone. I think she may just surprise you.”
Jo looked down at the plush carpet beneath her feet. “It’s the not knowing that has me tied up in knots. Her reaction, what’s going to come of the talk at all, whether she’ll be gone from my life by tomorrow night.”
“I know,” Ada said. “But I think you’re both ready for this conversation, and whether it ends up with you together or apart, at least you’ve been honest.”
Jo’s chest ached. “You’re right. The talk needs to happen no matter what.”
“Tell you what, I’ll come over on Saturday morning and be there for you either way.Ifyou end up coming home.” Jo could feel Ada’s grin from across the city. “And if you don’t come home and it all goes far better than you’re expecting…then I guess I should prepare myself for you to be less available in the future.”
“Let’s just take it one step at a time, yeah?”
“One step at a time.”
Amelia wrappedher hands around her cup, staring out the window onto the high street. Her cappuccino had gone cold long ago, the milk forming a thin film on the surface, but she couldn’t bring herself to order another. She wasn’t here for the coffee. She wasn’t sure why she’d come here at all. The little cafe in the city centre was one she rarely used. It was too open and too exposed with its floor-to-ceiling windows and pale wood tables. But that had appealed to her this morning. After a night hidden in the dark, pressed skin to skin with a woman she couldn’t have, Amelia needed light and brightness. She needed to breathe.
She hadn’t slept for a second. Her mind had played back every moment on a loop, each one more vivid than the last. Jo had laid herself bare last night. She’d whispered Amelia’s name and confessed to being in love with her under the guise of some harmless roleplay.
Only it wasn’t harmless.
Amelia had felt every word as they’d settled in her chest. Her hands had shaken when she’d arrived home, her knees had buckled in the shower, and she couldn’t stop remembering the things Jo had said. How much she wished she could have her. How she would never hurt her. How…she loved her.
And Amelia—grown woman with her life together—was sitting in a coffee shop like a teenager who didn’t know how to face the girl she liked.
She was supposed to be seeing Jo tomorrow, but a part of her wanted to go there now. To drive to Jo’s flat, knock on the door, and just ask her outright. Did you mean it? Do you love me? Did you know it was me last night? Of course, she couldn’t do that. She was barely holding it together as it was. The risk of getting the answers she didn’t want was too high.
“Jesus Christ.”
A voice to the side of Amelia caught her off-guard, pulling her from her spiralling thoughts.
She frowned and looked up.
Ada.
Jo’s Ada. Her ever-present, ever-wise, ever-sarcastic best friend. The last person Amelia was ready to deal with today.
“Hi.” Amelia managed a smile as she sat up a little straighter.
“Fancy seeing you here.” Ada grinned as she pulled the chair out opposite. “Mind if I join you?”
“No, of course not.” Amelia waved a hand to the empty seat, trying to mask the tremble in her fingers. “Be my guest.”
Ada sat and gave Amelia a good, long look. “You look like shit.”
Amelia lifted a brow. “That bad, huh?”
“Mmhmm.” Ada tilted her head, something knowing in her expression. “Didn’t sleep?”
Amelia hesitated. “No.”
“Weird.” Ada picked up the menu but didn’t read a word of it. “Jo didn’t sleep either.”
The weight of that name in the air pressed down on Amelia’s chest. She didn’t know how much Ada knew, but it was likely far more than Amelia hoped.
Ada looked up. “She’s still in a bit of a daze, to be honest. You have that effect on her.”
“I’m not sure that’s a good thing,” Amelia said as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I don’t want to make things harder for her. She’s still getting over Callum, I think.”
