"I want to tell her how I feel. I want to see where this goes. I want to stop pretending she's just my teammate's sister when she's become so much more." I sat back down, defeated. "But I also don't want to blow up my best friend's life. Or hers."
"Those desires aren't mutually exclusive, Derek. You can pursue Rosalie and respect Aaron. It might be complicated, yes. It might require difficult conversations. But complicated doesn't mean impossible."
I pulled out my phone and looked at our text thread. Her last message was still fresh on my phone from when she was making me laugh in the waiting room. She was always on my mind.
"She makes me want to try," I said quietly. "Even though I'm terrified. Even though I might screw it up. She makes me want to be brave enough to try."
"That's growth, Derek. A few months ago, you wouldn't have admitted that to yourself, let alone to me."
"Yeah, well. She's been teaching me that being vulnerable isn't the same as being weak."
Dr. Morrison smiled. "She sounds like a good influence."
"The best." I checked the time. "Shit, I'm supposed to meet the guys for coffee in ten minutes."
"Before you go," Dr. Morrison said, "I want you to thinkabout something this week. You've spent a lot of time focusing on what you've lost, including your old knee, your fearless playing style, and your pre-injury identity. But what have you gained?"
"Therapy bills?" I tried to joke, but Doc remained unimpressed.
"Besides those. Really think about it. Sometimes we're so focused on the cost of change that we miss the gifts it brings." He stood, walking me to the door. "Same time next week?"
"Yeah. Thanks, Doc."
I left his office still thinking about his question. What had I gained?
CHAPTER TWELVE
ROSALIE
The smell of coffee was overpowering as I focused on my project. I lowkey hated group projects, and thankfully, my classmates felt the same, as we split it up and agreed to put it together. So, there I was in Rise and Caffeinate, drinking my usual Chai and struggling.
I struggled to focus on the task at hand; all I could think about was Derek and his lips.
Even before the kiss, he occupied a big portion in my mind, but now... holy shit. I think I was having an addiction. But the good kind. The kind that made you all giddy and made you feel mushy on the inside. I just wanted more.
We haven't seen each other much; he was busy with practice and the possibility of starting, and I was busy with my constantly twitching leg and the need to dance. I woke up at the crack of dawn each morning to improv in the studio while it was empty before my workout, and after my group classes, I stayed behind to dance. I was working out and dancingtwice a day, which still wasn't even half the time when I was training, yet Daisy found it crazy how much I worked out.
Guess it was different perspectives.
"So, I think we are official," Daisy ended her monologue that I mostly fully missed as I daydreamed over my homework. I was good at multitasking, but not that good.
"I'm sorry?" I asked, closing my book and lifting my eyes up to meet hers. "Could you repeat?"
"I said," she smiled wider. "Jeremy asked me to be his girlfriend."
"Wait, do people do that?" I gaped. "Like the whole: will you be my girlfriend... isn't that just obvious? It just happens?"
Daisy furrowed her brows. "No. You don't assume you're in a relationship until you have the talk.”
"So if I go on several dates with a guy..." I started
"That's dating."
"But what if those dates include sex?"
Daisy shrugged. "That's hooking up."
"Hooking up is when there are no dates, no?" I was confused.
