My lips tighten into a flat line. I breathe deeply, in and out, to try to hold myself in check… but then, I can’t help myself.
“That’s bullshit.”
Ember’s head jerks back, and I internally wince at my tone. It came out too harsh, but I think she needs to hear it. Her father’s behavior is inexcusable—much likemyfather’s behavior. Both of them have made very poor decisions that affect their children, not to mention their relationships with their children.
“What?” she asks, frowning.
“I said, it’sbullshit. Life chips away at all of us—that’s the nature of being alive. It’s not easy, Ember, and I don’t think it’ssupposedto be easy.We struggle, we fail, we succeed, but regardless of what happens, we keep going. Your father deciding to drink himself into a stupor is inexcusable. It’s cruel, neglectful, and frankly, problematic as fuck. Don’t make excuses for him; he doesn’t deserve them.”
She swallows, gazing down at her hands. I think I see her eyes briefly shimmer with tears, and my heart falls. Christ, I didn’t mean to—I didn’t want to—
“He’s not perfect. He’s not even all that good, but he loves me in his own way,” she says softly.
“How do you know?” I ask. “When was the last time he was home to tell you he loves you?”
“I have a home because he loves me,” she replies, a bit more harshly. This is the point in the night where I either need to start treadingcarefully, or risk crossing a different sort of line. “Besides,” she goes on, voice softer. “He’s… he’s all I have, Max.”
“That’s not true. You have me.” She’llalwayshave me. There’s very little I wouldn’t do for this girl.
“I won’t,” she whispers. “Not always.”
Before I can ask what thefuckshe means by that, the waitress returns with our drinks. I watch Ember bring hers to her lips, watch those luscious fucking lips I can’t stop staring at part, and watch her delicate throat work with a swallow. Her eyes brighten and she licks her lips, and suddenly, I’m picturing myself devouring those lips with my hand wrapped around her neck, controlling the air that she breathes.
“Mm,” she hums her approval. “Good choice, thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” I pick up my drink and take a sip, hoping that the burn chases away the raging inferno of need I feel for this girl. It doesn’t. “What the fuck do you mean, you won’t always have me?” I prompt.
She takes another sip of her drink. “I mean, you go to college a thousand miles away. You want to go to the vet program in your university after undergrad, and I’m sure you’ll get accepted and excel. Then, you’ll probably find a nice girl to settle down with—a girl who won’t like you having other female friends—and that’ll be the epilogue of our story.”
I blink slowly, taking a beat to digest what she’s said and holding myself back from barking out a response.Breathe, motherfucker.
“I’ll give you a list of reasons as to why you’re wrong,” I say carefully. “First of all, there are plenty of great vet schools—and one of the best ones is in this state. I’ve already put feelers out there. If I get accepted, that’s my top pick. Even ifnot,” I go on, watching her expression, “then I’ll come back here after. I don’t want to be far from my family.”
That’s a bald-faced lie. I don’t want to be far fromEmber. Or from my mother—I might have lost some respect for her the day I realized she married a gangster, but I still love her dearly. I’d never abandon or ghost her.
“You’ll still find a girl—”
“If a girl has an issue with our friendship, then she’s not the one for me.”You’re the only one for me—
Fuck, I need to stop.
“You say that now—”
“I’ve already ghosted multiple hookups when they started commenting on how often you and I speak.” Ember’s eyes widen at that revelation, and I seal my lips.Oops. Might’ve been too soon to let that tidbit of information slip.
“What?” she breathes.
I knock back the rest of my drink. “Yeah. I’m not giving you up, Flame. I grew up as a spoiled only-child—I’m not good at sharing.”
She tilts her head to the side, looking confused, intrigued, and unnerved all at once. “What do you mean?”
“Ask me after your birthday.” My mouth is moving faster than my brain; I need to shut the fuck up right now. Instead, I switch topics. “Finish your drink—it’s getting late, and we should get home.”
I tried to keep my mind off it, but later, I realized that I made my decision that night. Ember was mine, no ifs, ands, or buts.
Chapter Thirty
Ember
