He bit down on a sob, turning his face away.
“Oh, hey. Luis. It’s okay,” Cassie said gently. “I wasn’t–I didn’t mean it like that. Family shit is complicated. It’s… it’s sohard when the person you want to love you, that you want to care about you, hurts you. It’s natural to want a connection with your parent, and it’s not your fault that she’s like that. It’s not your fault that you still want your mother to love you.”
She wasn’t trying to hurt him, but the words still stung.
“It’s not like I don’t get it,” Luis said, sniffling. “Like, even when she slammed the door last night, a little part of me was relieved. A little part of me was glad that it was finally over. I just feel so stupid because it hurts. It’s stupid that I care about what she thinks when she’s so–so awful.”
He pushed himself up out of the sweaty sheets. A headache starting in his temples. He needed a shower.
“Hey, do you want me to come?” Cassie asked. “I could be there in like four hours.”
Luis glanced at the phone screen. It was almost dinner time. If she came, she’d be here just for part of Sunday before she had to drive back for classes. Eight hours of driving, and for what? Luis might be having a breakdown, but he wasn’tdying.
“No. No. I’m fine. Mostly,” Luis waved a hand. “I’ll–I’ll get over it.”
She gave him a look that said she didn’t at all believe him.
“Really,” Luis said, raking a hand over his unruly hair. “Look, I’m even getting up.”
“Wow, how impressive,” she said flatly.
Luis started toward the bathroom. He needed water and tissues and then maybe a hot shower.
“But seriously,” Cassie continued, “I can come. You shouldn’t have to be alone right now.”
“You were just telling me how packed your week is, the drive’s too far. I’m not dying,” Luis insisted.
“Yeah, well, you mean the fucking world to me, man. If you want me there, I’ll come.” He knew she meant it.
“I’m okay, Cass,” Luis was at his closet, digging through it in the poor light for fresh clothes. “I just need to stop wallowing. You’re already helping.”
Cassie blew out a loud breath. “Your mom’s a piece of shit. And she’s gotten worse, right? It’s not just me?”
Luis shrugged.
“I scrolled her page after I saw that post she made,” Cassie said. “She’s been posting a lot of anti-vampire shit.” There was a pause. “Is she still going to that culty-church?”
“I dunno,” Luis found a shirt, some soft shorts, and a pair of underwear.
“You know…” Cassie said slowly, “it wouldn’t surprise me if the church she was going to was Purist. I mean, some of those posts were… a lot.”
“Yeah,” Luis said non-committally. He tended not to look at her social media posts. It only pissed him off.
“I miss you so fucking much,” Cassie said. “We’re going to hang, just as soon as my labs let me breathe, okay? Beers and those Korean wings near my old place. At least three dozen. We’ll eat until we’re sick.”
“Sounds good,” Luis said, and now his throat was sticky again.
There was a pause, and then, “Hey Lou?”
“Yeah?” He took his bundle of clothes toward the bathroom.
“We don’t have to talk about it right now, but Karim and Julien, they treat you well?” She asked. “Are you safe with them?”
He paused, bruised by her concern. “Yeah. They do,” he said. “I’m safe with them.”
She nodded. “Good. You deserve good people in your life.”
Luis flicked the bathroom light on, setting his clothes on the counter.
