Luis could barely hear him over the pounding in his ears. It was Saturday night, almost Sunday.Jesus,he was so fucking stupid. He should’ve done the treatment days ago.
Now it was about to beSunday.
“I-I need to go–” he turned his phone over to look, and half a dozen alarms and reminders for his treatment were stacked up in his notifications. The battery was nearly drained from how urgently his phone was trying to notify him.
“Stay a little longer, please. Let us at least feed you,” Julien said. “Please, you’re in no condition to be out by yourself.”
That was probably true, but right now his red blood cells were a greater threat. If the doctor hadn’t done any bloodwork on him, hadn’t done anything invasive, he wouldn’t have noticed. Or maybe any symptoms Luis was showing he’d putdown to the drug. Luis hadn’t been conscious to give his medical history.
“I have to go,” Luis said, at a loss. Even as he said it, he knew he couldn’t get home under his own steam. He didn’t know what to say to Julien though, couldn’t imagine telling him the reason why he had to leave.
“At least have something before you go. Karim,” Julien called, when the silence went on too long. “Can you make Luis something to eat?”
There was a beat, and then Karim peeked in the door. He’d clearly been listening and pretending not to. “Oh hey, you’re up.”
The comment was missing Karim’s usual bristle.
Great, Luis was now so pathetic that even Karim was being nice to him.
“Any food allergies?” Karim asked.
Luis stared at him blankly. What?
“No?”
Karim nodded and disappeared. Julien reached over to the side table and lifted the glass of water sitting there. It was heavy when he placed it in Luis’s hand, but Julien didn’t let go. Instead, his other arm slid more completely around Luis and Julien helped him bring the glass to his lips.
Luis did his best not to flinch at the touch, at the care. How long had it been since someone had touched him that wasn’t his mother or a medical professional? Too long, far too long.
“That’s good,” Julien said as he drank. The water was cool and crisp. It was maybe the best glass of water he’d ever had.
He finished, leaning back against Julien’s embrace, too weak to do anything else. He’d done nothing since waking up, and already he was exhausted. He felt like he’d run a marathon.
Was it the last of the drugs, or his impending medical emergency?
“Just be easy. You need to rest,” Julien said.
Luis wanted nothing more than to rest, but he couldn’t do it here. He had to get home, or give up and let them take him to a hospital.
It was hardly a choice. If he wasn’t actively having a stroke or a heart attack or a blood clot, he wasn’t going to the hospital. He’d refuse.
But his will would only last so long as he wasn’t having a medical emergency. He needed to get home, but he couldn’t even stand. He felt like a ticking bomb, and he couldn’t even check to see how bad it was. He was flying blind.
Stupid, so stupid.
“I’ll go get you more water,” Julien said about the empty glass. He eased Luis back against the headboard, making sure he was supported by the plush, expensive pillows before he stood.
Luis closed his eyes when Julien left. Calm, he needed to stay calm.
Thirty minutes and another glass of water later, Luis still hadn’t come up with a solution, but he had gotten his freshly laundered clothes back. Julien then, to his horror, had to help him into them because his body was all cement limbs.
When that was finished, Julien helped Luis to the bathroom.
Because today had no limit to its humiliations.
Julien did all of it with an exceptional amount of professionalism, but every time he touched Luis, it felt like it left a mark.
Fuck, he was a mess.
