My chest isn’t as small as it used to be.
I never needed a bra, but it feels like I might need one now.
Looking at myself in the mirror gives me an odd feeling in my gut.
I don’t look like I used to.
My face is slightly more rounded, softer.
My eyes look brighter, less sunken.
And my clothes aren’t hanging limply on my body.
I look like I’ve thrown on the tightest top and jeans that I own.
It feels vaguely scandalous, like I’m dressing to attract attention.
That’s the last impression I want to make to the woman who runs this place, and anyone else I happen to come in contact with when I leave my hospital room.
If I had any alternative that wasn’t pajamas, I’d be taking it.
“They’re just clothes,” I remind myself as I try to be okay with how they fit.
I’ve already made Dr. Clarke wait an extra few minutes simply because I’m shocked that I have a curvier body now.
It’s so dumb. No one’s going to look at me. I know the people here see me as a patient. They don’t care what I look like, and I shouldn’t care, either.
I step out of the bathroom and move to the bed, picking up my sneakers from underneath and sitting down to put them on. They were white when I got them, one of the only new itemsColleen ever managed to get for me, but they’re worn-in and tattered from overuse, and they’re nowhere near as comfortable as they used to be.
At least my feet haven’t gotten bigger.
I’ve got to try to see the positive side.
I lace them and stand up.
I’m steadier on my feet now.
I take in a deep breath and let it back out slowly.
Everything changed for me the day I was brought here.
And everything is going to change again one day soon.
I’m determined to be ready for that.
Even if I’m not sure what it’s going to mean.
Chapter Four
Robin
Itake Dr. Clarke’s arm when I leave the room. The hallway seems narrow, and my tight clothing feels weirdly restrictive. I try to clear my head as I let him lead me down the corridor.
“This is just a talk,” Dr. Clarke reminds me. “You don’t have to make any decisions today. That’s not what this is about. Lana just wants to get an idea of what you might want to do.”
I nod slowly.
Lana Cole is the woman in charge of Goldcrest Omega Academy.
