“Good.” I stood and surveyed the courtyard once again. “Now, if you will excuse me, Ena, I have to find my cousin.”
She pointed to one side of the courtyard. “He keeps the Seid in those rooms, usually.”
I took a step toward them before remembering I had one more question to ask. “Ena, where can I find you when the time comes?”
She pointed to a door on the opposite side of the courtyard. “That’s the hall to the servants’ quarters. I’m the fifth door on the left.”
“All right.” I swallowed, the memories of my own time in Adis’s servants’ quarters rising to the surface. “I’ll see you then.”
I moved away, toward the doors she had pointed out. I had passed them earlier, but they had all been closed, just as they were now.
But, unlike before, I now had more information, which had me seeing the doors in a new light.
There were four of them between my current position and the door I had emerged from, and only one had a guard stationed outside.
Which meant I knew exactly where Collum was being kept.
I was pretty sure fate was at play here. How else could I explain that I had met Ena within my first day of being back? Regardless,I still swore to tread carefully moving forward, ensuring I tucked my dagger into my bodice each time I left my room. Just in case.
My plans to rescue Collum that evening were foiled when there was a knock at my door just after I finished dinner. Before I could answer, the door swung open to reveal Leif leaning against the doorframe, one arm above his head, a satisfied smile on his face. He moved his neck, effectively flicking the hair out of his face. While it was an attractive move, it didn’t cause flames inside me anymore. Whatever had been so special between us, likely just the novelty, was fading, and fast. The empathy I had read told me it was completely different for him.
I frowned. I knew I needed to keep the ruse going, but I didn’t want to hurt Leif any more than I had to, either. Though it was becoming apparent to me that we weren’t a match, I didn’t hate him.
Before I could answer, he was crossing the room in large strides and pulling me into his arms. “What’s wrong? What happened?”
That did it. The tears flowed down my face. “I’m sorry, Leif.”
“About what, my heart?”
I pulled back and sucked a deep breath into my lungs, which only sped up the tears. I couldn’t stop the confession that was coming.
Leif moved to the sitting area in the corner of the room, pulling me down on the settee next to him before pulling a cloth out of his pocket and wiping up my tears.
“Talk to me, my heart.”
I nodded, but it wasn’t until several moments later that my tears slowed enough for me to be able to formulate words. “I’m sorry, Leif,” I said at last, my voice a near whisper, “But I don’t think I feel the same way about you that you feel about me.”
The moment I stopped speaking, several emotions crossed his face. “But . . . we are weighted.”
“I know, Leif, but this . . . this pull you speak of . . . I don’tfeel it when we are apart. I also didn’t miss you today.” His face crumpled, so I hurriedly added, “I like you, Leif, I just don’t want you thinking something about me that isn’t true.”
“I understand.” His grip on my arms fell and he leaned back against the couch. “I was just so sure?—”
“Maybe there is just something wrong with me?” I suggested.
Leif shook his head vehemently before pulling me back to his chest until I was now sprawled across his lap. “No, you are perfect, Runa. I just . . . I thought when I felt the pull . . . I was so certain . . .”
The only thing I felt at his words was relief.
“But . . .” His voice quickened. “Maybe there is something else going on, like you said. Maybe it has something to do with how we met. I must research this!” His attitude completely changed and he brushed me aside, jumping from the couch and running toward the door. “Come on, let’s go to the library.”
I bit my lip. I needed to find Collum tonight, the rolling in my gut told me as much. “Leif, I’m really tired. Maybe I can go with you tomorrow?”
The smile faded from his features, but I could feel the understanding flowing my way as well. “Sure, my heart. I’ll come get you first thing in the morning.” He bounded back across the room to pull me up and place a kiss on my lips.
Then he was out the door, the sound of his footsteps fading.
I waited until I could no longer hear them at all before slipping my dagger, which I had hidden under the mattress, into my bodice. I still didn’t know how to use it, but hopefully I wouldn’t need to.
