“We should stop,” he whispered against my lips.
I nodded, but I didn’t stop, choosing instead to press harder into the ridges of muscle that inhabited his back. His hands moved to fondle my breasts through my dress as our lips met once more. It was my turn to moan.
“My heart . . .” He pulled himself away, both of us panting, his grip firm on my ribs as he physically restrained my lips from returning to his. “I want you, but not like this.” He glanced toward the closed door. “We could be interrupted at any time. I want our first time together to be something truly special.”
My heart fluttered, but at the same time, I frowned. “What if we never have time alone? I’m basically a glorified prisoner here.” My chest pinched at my admission.
He shook his head. “We will. I am working on getting you out, okay? Then we will consummate.”
My eyebrows rose at the fancy word. “Consummate?”
He nodded. “Once weighted have sex for their first time, their relationship is officially established.”
I tilted my head to the side. “Does anything change?”
He smiled and brushed his finger down my nose. “I don’t think so, but weighteds are so few these days I’ve never met one. All I know is what I’ve been told, and supposedly, the sex is out of this world.”
I leaned my head against his chest, listening to his heartbeatas I pondered his explanation. Back when I was at home, I couldn’t foresee a relationship between myself and a man escalating this quickly, and now that we were here, I knew for certain there was something more at work. Because never before had I desired a man like I did Leif in that moment.
We stayed there for an indistinguishable amount of time, just holding each other in a comfortable state of contentment, until there was a knock at the door. Leif groaned as he disentangled himself from me. “Until we meet again, my heart,” he whispered before brushing my lips with his in a hurried goodbye.
I watched as he walked toward the door, pausing to throw one last kiss over his shoulder.
I wanted to beg him to take me with him.
But my lips stayed pressed together.
And then the room was entirely too empty.
CHAPTER 27
The next morning came with the realization that I had officially been away from my twin for a season, as there was a notification with breakfast that the dying season was ending, meaning it would officially be the dead season on the morrow. In the meantime, I would have to struggle through the darkest night of the year alone. The one during which neither moon deigned to rise.
Although Milo and I hadn’t always seen eye to eye, he knew how much the darkness scared me. For a reason, I had never been able to put into words.
I often wondered, when the gods had designed this world, why they had created a sun that needed rest. As well as why both moons couldn’t take their vacation from the sky on different nights. It was something I resolved to ask, if I ever got the chance to meet them.
But the gods hadn’t been seen, or heard of, for over a millennia. My mother had said they’d gone on to make other worlds—worlds which needed a guiding hand more than this one—and she was confident they would return someday. But when I’d asked my father, he’d said our world was a failed experiment and that the gods had abandoned us for something new.
When I was younger, there had been festivals on the moonless night before the massacre of those with Seid lineage had scared everyone of the dark. Back when my parents were alive.
I missed those days and knew I would spiral if I thought about them now, so I forced the thoughts from my mind.
Whether or not the gods would return to guide us was unknown.
In the meantime, I would continue on as I had been for far too long, as a prisoner, but unable to know where I would go without someone telling me what to do. Hopefully, these days were almost over, and I could finally be free.
But that brought forth a whole new host of fears.
I wasn’t sure what life would look like with Leif’s coven, but I hoped I would be able to have a garden and some potion supplies. I would spend my days tending to the flowers and then mixing them into the hand creams and cures I’d developed. I’d share them all with the coven, for free, if I could. Then, as my years came to an end, I would develop a book to explain everything to a protégé. A protégé I would save from a fate she did not desire.
A smile ghosted my lips at the image behind my eyelids.
I didn’t get to dwell in my daydreams for too long, though, because before I knew it, Leif was pushing open the door, a smile on his face as he crossed the room and collected me in his arms.
Our lips met in a heated kiss and I was reminded of how rapidly Leif had become a person of comfort for me. I relaxed in his arms.
He was the one to break the kiss. “I missed you,” he whispered into my hair as he rested his head on mine.
