I nod my head because he’s right. I shouldn’t have made that decision for him. “I know, and I’m sorry for making that decision for us.” I take a deep breath and blow it out. “But there was more to the decision than your reputation. I was also thinking about Elsie, and about our future as a family.”
He folds his arms over his chest, leveling me with a stern look. “What, more are you talking about?”
I take a deep breath, preparing to share words that could change everything.
Words that might ruin us beyond repair.
Chapter 25: Cody
“Georgia came to visit me two weeks ago on her way back to North Carolina from Atlanta. When she was here, she saw a picture of Elsie that I had tacked up on the fridge,” Mae begins.
“Okay…” I respond, not knowing where this is going.
“She’d never seen a picture of her before, and she mentioned that she looked a lot like your mom’s photos from when she was a kid.”
My eyebrows drop.What does my mom have to do with any of this?
“I’m not understanding.”
Mae continues, “I showed her a picture of my ex and a few more of Elsie, but it wasn’t one hundred percent clear. I tried to do the math… from the last time we slept together that summer when we were nineteen years old, and for the first time, I realized there was a small chance that Vance may not be Elsie’s father...”
What.
“W-what are you saying?” I demand, taking a step backward and reaching for the cold, hospital room doorknob to steady myself.
She bites down on her lip nervously as her eyes shift. “When I found out I was pregnant with her, our last night together hadn’t been on my mind. I’d met Vance literally the week after you and I said goodbye. It was so painful for us to separate thatsummer. I felt like I was losing a piece of my heart moving away. I blocked our goodbye from my memory. It never even crossed my mind…”
I watch her in horror as a single tear drops down her cheek. I want to step forward and brush it away, but I need to hear the words. I need to hear the words that confirm what she’s hinting at.
“Who is Elsie’s father?” I ask quietly.
“Georgia got Wilder's DNA, and I provided Elsie's. She sent it to a lab to confirm paternity.” She blows out a steady breath. “Cody, you’re Elsie’s father.”
Her words fall hollow and flat. That’s not possible. That can’t be. There’s no way she’s my daughter and I’ve never even fucking met her.
“That’s not possible. How is it that I have a nine-year-old daughter that I’ve never met!” I’m yelling now, and I know it’s partially directed at Mae and partially directed at the years stolen from me. The shock courses through my body as I realize, I’m a dad to a girl I don't even know. A little girl who thinks her real dad is a monster and has been afraid of him reappearing her whole life.
She’s crying much harder now as she buries her face in her hands and nods, choking on her sobs. “I know you... I know you… I know you didn’t want to be a father right now," she pushes out. "You made that clear enough on your Instagram post about Harper. I just wanted to do the right thing and tell you, even if that means things are over between us for good or you want joint custody of her. But please know, I’ve been a single mom for almost nine years. I’m capable of raising her on my own.”
“On your own?” I yell. My feet eat up the space that’s between us until I’m dropping down in front of her, kneeling between her legs. “Mae, can’t you see?” I soften my voice. “I’ve been going crazy without you in my life. All I’ve ever wanted since I met youat that damn rodeo ten years ago wasyou. To love you, to protect you, to do life with you. I. Want. You. Mae Beaumont. Mae Jones. Mae Sterling, and every other last name you decide to take. I want you as Mae Cameron, damn it!”
Her eyes shift to meet mine as the tears continue to fall.
“I was so heartbroken and overwhelmed when we separated, when I found out that I was pregnant with Vance, a guy I'd just met, it was a gut blow. My parents practically forced us to get married. I just… I feel so incredibly foolish for not even considering that she could have been yours.” She shakes her head. “I hate myself... The wasted years she’s spent without a father. She'll hate me when she finds out, Cody.”
I squeeze her hands tightly, still not fully processing just the depth of everything that she’s unveiled.
“Mae, she won’t hate you. She didn’t know. You didn’t know. We can explain to her what happened. How we loved each other very much when she was conceived. We start now. We can introduce me to her slowly. We don’t have to give her all the details immediately, but Mae, I can’t wait to meet her. I’ve wanted to meet her from the moment I found out about her when I walked into your office and didn't know she was mine. A little version of you that I know must be strong because of who raised her despite all the sacrifice.” I swallow. The lump in my throat feels thick. “I-I think I’m in shock right now.”
Her head is still tilted downward, so I gently place a finger under her chin and lift her face to meet mine. “Mae, please don’t mistake my shock for disappointment. I’m so happy right now. And more than anything, I don’t want to finish this tour. I just want to spend the next years of my life with you, making love to you and getting to know our daughter.”
She starts crying harder, and I can’t tell if they’re tears of happiness or because she knows I shouldn’t do that. Because she doesn’t want me to. She doesn't want me to regret cancelling my tour and though I know I never would regret choosing her andElsie, she's right that people are counting on me to finish what I’ve started.
“But I understand I can’t do that right now, and I don’t want to throw off Elsie’s routine by barreling into her life as her dad. But dammit, I’d love it if you’d bring her to a few of my concerts so that I can get to know her slowly. I don’t want to waste any more time not knowing our daughter.”
Mae looks up, her eyes serious. “You really want that?”
“Mae Sterling, I want it all. With you and Elsie. I want us to be a family. I want to get back the years that your parents stole from us and make new, even better memories together."
