“Truth now. What’s eating you up?” Nash grabbed my forearm and pulled me to face him. “Come on Gun, tell me.”
I groaned. A deep one right from the bottom of my gut. “I think maybe me and Cassidy have kind of ended things.”
He blinked slowly. “Fuck off. Really?”
“Yep. Well, I think so.” We both rested our arms on the top rail and watched Rocket. Maybe it was because we were men, or maybe because we were brought up by a dickweed of a dad, but we often had our most meaningful conversations not looking ateach other. “I thought she wanted the same as me, you know. With the camp.”
“I thought she was all in. Last night at the meeting she was supporting it and us.” He sighed and I wondered what was going through his head. Whether he was wondering what I’d done to mess it up, because let’s face it I wasn’t known for my relationship success. “What did she say?”
Thinking about it, her words, it didn’t seem quite as negative or as world crushing as it had at the time.
“It was when she told Margie that the school was her priority,” I told him.
“And?”
I turned to see him looking like I’d just told him that Unicorns really did exist. “What’s that look for?”
“Of course, the school is her priority over the camp. That’s her job, her profession.”
“But we talked about her teaching at the camp full time?” The words rolled off my tongue with a hint of bitterness.
“Talked or agreed?” Nash asked. “Did you draw up a contract?”
I sighed. “No, of course, we didn’t. We talked about it, and she thanked me for believing in her.”
Nash rolled his eyes, and I knew who the bad influence was on Bertie for that habit.
“Quit with the damn eye roll, Nash.”
“Well, you quit being a pussy then,” he cried. Rocket’s head shot up, his cautious eyes on us. “Sorry,” he whispered and ducked his head in regret before putting his eyes back on me. “You need to man up and realize that her putting her job first, the kids she teaches first, is an admirable quality.”
“But we were going to do this together.” I waved my hand in the direction of the camp. “It was her idea; it’s become something that I can’t imagine not happening.”
“Who says it won’t happen?” He threw his hands in the air. “I heard what she said at that meeting, and she was reassuring a worried parent. Gun,” he said, placing a hand on my shoulder, “what’s this all about? Really?”
“I told you. It was my understanding that she was going to teach at the camp.” My words were firm. The bitterness had gone but the anger was still there.
“We don’t even know if the camp will work yet.” He was quiet and controlled. Just like he always was. The voice of reason. “What if it doesn’t go ahead because of the development?”
“So, you’re doubting it now as well.”
He shook his head. “For fuck’s sake, Gunner. No, I’m not doubting it, but why ruin everything with the woman you love over something that we’re in the first stages of or because she’s good at her damn job.”
“I never said I loved her,” I bit back.
Nash’s lips quivered into a smirk. “Whatever little bro. The point is don’t push her away for something that might not even be an issue.”
“Says the man who wouldn’t even look at Lily when she came back.”
He shrugged. “And look how miserable I was until I saw what a dick I was. Now I’m the happiest fucker on earth.”
“Most annoying fucker on earth.” I pushed off the fence. “I have work to do.”
Nash put a flat palm against my chest. “Gun, don’t ruin this because you’re too pig-headed to talk to her. Whether you believe it or not you love her, or you’re well on the way to it at least. That my friend,” he tapped my pec with his pointer finger, “is fact and whether she teaches at the camp or not won’t change that. It won’t change how she feels about you, unless you carry on being a fucking turnip.”
“You don’t know how she feels about me,” I spat back like a spoiled toddler.
Nash simply laughed, from deep in his belly, waved a hand at me and then strolled off pulling his ball cap back on.
