Thoughts of my mom filled my heart with love, the memories bringing a smile. “I know it was. She did it right up until she died.”
The familiar slice of grief cut through me remembering my mom, with her deep raucous laugh and no nonsense attitude. “When she died, Social Services asked me to keep the kids we had until they could find somewhere else for them. I was only eighteen and was working the farm with just two part-time hands helping me out.”
“That’s a lot of responsibility, Cass.”
“It was. One I didn’t want, but,” I shrugged, “I ended up loving every minute of it.”
“How many kids were there?”
“Three. Meghan aged eleven, Savannah, who was eight and her little brother, Max who was six. It was hard work, difficult at times but so rewarding. Savannah loved Mom so it took her a while to let me in, but we got there, and I loved those kids so much by the end of the six months. We loved each other.”
Lily’s expression was full of sympathy for me, her eyes shining as she placed a hand over her heart. “That must have been awful, saying goodbye to them.”
“It was.” Coughing to clear the lump in my throat, I continued. “But I knew it was the best thing for them. And now they’re all thriving. Meghan is working as a wedding planner in LA, Savannah is starting college this year, studying finance while Max is doing well in high school.” I smiled softly, a familiar sting to my eyes whenever I thought of the kids. “I remember Max crying himself to sleep for the first two weeks after he and Savannah came to us. Mom used to sit outside his door,whispering fairy stories just so he wouldn’t feel alone. After she passed I did the same, for as long as he needed. Even though some nights all I wanted to do was cry, too. When I did, it was quiet, so the kids wouldn’t hear. I just needed to do it right for them. Be enough for them.”
“Did they all get permanent families?” Her tone was hushed like she was waiting for bad news.
“Savannah and Max did but not Meghan. She stayed with a great foster family until she was eighteen and went to college. Savannah and Max were adopted by a lovely middle-aged couple who live on a ranch in Montana. They’ve had the best life they could have asked for. Four older brothers in their late teens and early twenties who are even more protective than their parents.”
“How come you’ve never told me any of this before?” Lily asked.
“I don’t know. It was ten years ago and they’re happy. I speak to them every birthday and Christmas and we all have a video call once a year for a catch up.”
“So, what happened with Mrs. Wright?”
“She wants me to agree to foster Lucas, Lily. If it’s necessary.”
“And you don’t want to?”
I shrugged. “It isn’t that I don’t want to, it’s just…”
“It hurt letting them go and you don’t want the same to happen with Lucas.”
There was a good reason why Lily Miller had become my best friend over the last couple of years. She understood me and knew exactly how my brain worked.
“That’s it exactly. What if it becomes clear his mom can’t take care of him, and I have him for a few months and then goes somewhere more permanent?”
“Do you think things are that bad at home for him?”
“I have no clue. I wouldn’t say it’s neglect exactly, maybe more apathy on her part. Maybe she’s just struggling.” Thewhole thing brought back memories of some of the poor kids that Mom took in. They were in a much worse condition than Lucas.
Lily dropped her feet to the floor and leaned forward, her hands cradling her glass of wine. “One of the things I know about your past is that you left the farm to become a teacher, because you wanted to help kids. Right?” I nodded. “And you taking Lucas in would be helping him. If that’s what is needed. Because can you imagine how he’d feel being taken from his mom and sent to live with someone he doesn’t know?”
Damn meddlesome woman.
“Ah fuck you, Lily.” I shook my head at letting myself be emotionally blackmailed by her. “I’m going to say yes, aren’t I?”
She smiled softly and nodded. “Of course you were.”
Chapter 4
So What – P!nk
Gunner
When I padded into the kitchen at almost three a.m. I hadn’t expected to see Cassidy sitting there. Especially not wearing some skimpy little silky shorts and matching top. She was at the table with one foot up on her chair scrolling through her phone. It was dark in there, bar the light from the screen reflected in her glasses, and she was reading a document of some kind. Her chin was resting on her knee while she chewed on her thumbnail.
“Something interesting?” I asked.
